A Shot at Love
by CatwomanNY
Summary: FBI Agent Caroline James is one of the best snipers in the country. It's life in front of the scope that she's not good at. Thx to Dee for the help! NOW COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

It was a hot summer night. The type of night where the air was thick and still and the last place Caroline wanted to be was out in it, but duty had called. She'd been asleep in her king size bed, dreaming of something a lot nicer than a muggy August night, when the phone had awoken her. Aaron Hotchner and the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the FBI needed her and she could never say no to that man. So, she walked down the hallowed halls of Quantico, her black pumps causing her footsteps to echo as she made her way down the hallway to the familiar conference room. "So, you boys have confused your pistols with your privates again?"

"Isn't that the only reason anyone calls you?" Agent Hotchner smiled as he whipped around to see his old friend. "Caroline, how are you?" He shook her hand, noting just how well dressed she was for three o'clock in the morning in her signature black pantsuit.

"So, what are we dealing with here?"

"An L.D.S.K. I need to know what kind of weapon we're up against because we have no projectile."

"OK, give me what you've got." Sitting down, she grabbed the file but quickly stood up again. "You have the shot on video tape?"

"Yeah, a news crew was in the area when the shot went off."

"I want to hear it." Hotchner cued up the tape on the monitor and played it while she closed her eyes, but she quickly frowned. "Again." This time she was sure of what she heard and signaled him to shut it off. "You're right. It's not your typical projectile. Your weapon is a rifle, probably a Remington 22 caliber single shot bolt action from the sounds of it, but the sound of the bullet leaving the chamber sounded foreign. If I had to guess, I would say that it was some form of homemade ammo, maybe ice, though I've only heard of that once before."

"You got all that from listening to the shot twice?" The tall lanky younger man questioned.

Caroline smiled. "Dr. Reid, that's why they pay me the big bucks."

"How would someone go about making a bullet out of ice?"

"Liquid Nitrogen and a bullet mold. Packed correctly and with the right amount of powder, it can reach its intended target before dissipating completely, becoming almost untraceable. While not my preferred choice for a long range projectile, it is conceivable. You're looking for someone with an immense knowledge and passion for firearms. Probably military trained, but he's definitely been handling a weapon almost as long as he's been alive."

"So we're looking for a male version of you." The good-looking black man seated at the table finally stood up. "CJ, that doesn't give us much."

"Hey, I'm not the profiler, Derek. The only reason I'm called out of my office is because you guys can't figure out the difference between a rifle and a shotgun. I can tell you that he probably won't fire his weapon more than once at a scene. It's a single shot bolt action. He's got something to prove. One shot, one kill. He's not the type to over play his hand or take chances. He's also not going to leave you much in the way of evidence."

"And he will strike again." Hotch looked at the floor as he began pacing.

"I'd like to be there when he does. I can tell you more if I see his handy work."

Hotchner looked to the older man in the room and got a nod. "Sure, but you have to be packed and ready to go in a half hour."

"My bag's outside."

Hotchner was happy to have her along for this case. A knowledge of firearms like Caroline's was a gift and he was counting on that gift catching this lunatic running around Pittsburgh with a rifle.

"Have you ever worked in the field, Agent James?" Derek joked as he sat next to her on the plane.

"Once or twice, Agent Morgan. Including once where I saved your sorry ass." Caroline quipped back with a smile.

"Ouch, CJ." He laughed.

"No, you had a job to do and so did I. No regrets.'

"Never." The smile faded and he sat back in the seat.

"So, how's Dr. Reid working out? I know about the trouble he was having with his firearms quals."

"He's getting better. I think Hotch is working with him, but if you want to broach the subject, I don't think he'd turn you down." He laughed again. "I don't think any man would turn you down. He'd be too afraid you were going to take him out." Taking her hand, he squeezed it as she laughed a light and easy laugh.

"They dated once." The older agent sat down across from Dr. Reid when he saw him studying the interaction of Caroline and Morgan.

"They just seem very comfortable together." Reid thought for a minute. "Gideon, how does Hotch know her?"

"They've worked together before. She's the bureau's best ballistics technician and sniper."

"I'm just amazed that she's able to identify a gun by the sound."

Gideon smiled. "She's been handling a firearm since she was a child. Her father was a Marine sniper, as she was, and she was a music major at Annapolis. It's a gift that the FBI is very lucky to have access to."

"And I feel privileged to have access to the FBI's firepower." Caroline smiled as she sat down next to the young agent, shooting Gideon a look that caused him to nod and relocate his seat. "Dr. Reid, do you mind if I ask you a question?"

"I think you just did, but ask away." He watched her smile and couldn't help but smile in return.

"I see working with these clowns has rubbed off." She rolled her eyes. "OK, well, here's my question, and feel free to stop me if I get too personal. I heard about your troubles at the range so my question is whether or not you would want to work with me while you're in town. We can get you past those difficulties."

He thought for a minute and then nodded. "That might work." They shared a smile and she lightly squeezed his hand.

The next day, that smile was gone as she studied the new crime scene. Their Long Distance Serial Killer was good. Definitely military trained and this time he changed his weapon and ammo. He was showing off because he'd killed four people and thought he was going to get away with it. The profilers were working on why he did what he did and left her to focus on why he would suddenly change his weapon. It puzzled her. Most times, snipers found a gun they liked, that they had success with, and they stuck with it. The only time they would change would be if conditions changed and conditions hadn't changed. It was still a runner, marathoner in training, it was still a public area, and the subject was still killed with one shot.

"CJ?" Morgan stuck his head into the conference room three hours after they'd arrived and found Caroline staring at pictures of all five victims.

"I don't get it, Derek." She gestured to the first three photos. "These, he's showing off. This fourth one, he's sending us a message that he is at the top of his craft, but this fifth one, this fifth one is different. It still took skill, but it doesn't have the same flair and it's a different gun, a different caliber." She pulled down the first photo and the last. "It's a different guy."

"Show me." He sat down as she explained the difference in the wounds, the weapons, and the ammo.

"I'd say if you come out and credit this kill to him, he'll show us what he's made of, and I bet he'll slip up."

"You're betting another person's life on that, Caroline." Hotchner walked in. "I want him before a sixth body shows up."

"Aaron, this is the only way. This fifth kill had no style. It was a straight shot in the stomach. I could do that blindfolded. It wasn't as skillful as the first four. Either your guy is getting tired or this fifth one is a different shooter."

He nodded. "OK, tell J.J. what to tell the press and we'll wait."

Sure enough, once the FBI came out and told the media that the 'Runner Gunman' had struck again, it wasn't more than an hour before they got called to another crime scene and this time, Caroline was sure that it was the unsub they were looking for. Looking around, she spotted the perfect spot for a sniper's nest and they found an empty cooler. That was how he was transporting his frozen ammo and there were fingerprints on the handle.


	2. Chapter 2

By nightfall, they had a warrant to arrest the shooter and one to search his house, but the unsub didn't go quietly. He started shooting from the front windows of the house the minute they pulled up and both Morgan and Hotchner motioned for Caroline to flank him, which she did like a pro and felt the familiar adrenaline rush when she lowered her long rifle on the unsub's ear. She took a controlled breath, squeezed the trigger, and watched as the unsub fell to the floor, a bullet hole precisely placed in his brain, just as she watched him train his rifle on Morgan who was positioned behind the door to their SUV.

"I guess I owe you again."

"If you had had the shot, you would have taken it."

"If I had had the same rifle you had, I would have taken it." He smiled as he placed his arm around her shoulders. "You did good, CJ."

"Thank you for your help, Caroline." Hotchner smiled at her. "You can go take a look at the hardware he had if you want. Maybe you can find me the ammo he used so we can wrap this case up?"

"You got it." She smiled and jogged into the small clapboard cabin in the middle of the wide open field and began digging into the stockpiles of weapons and ammunition their unsub had amassed, actually impressed with the wide range of his cache. Finally, in the master bedroom, she found the container of liquid nitrogen and the bullet mold and she was amazed the lunatic hadn't frozen his hand off given the way he was storing his supplies, but her smile quickly faded and she drew her weapon when she heard the familiar sound of a gun cocking behind her.

Morgan had been in the other room and heard a door slam. Quickly drawing his gun, he slid along the wall until he found the master bedroom door. Listening, he heard two women, one being Caroline and she didn't sound like she was carrying on a casual conversation. Looking in the keyhole, he noticed another woman had Caroline's gun and he waited until he saw her turn around before kicking in the door. "FBI! Get on the ground!"

Taking the opportunity Derek had given her, Caroline reached into her ankle holster and pulled out her second weapon. "Do it or I will blow you away the same way I did your boyfriend." The woman dropped her gun and she holstered hers before pulling out her handcuffs. "I think we're even." She gestured at the other agent and he nodded before pushing her prisoner out the door.

"I thought you said that place was clear!" Morgan screamed at the local sheriff as they came out of the house. "You almost got an agent killed!"

"Derek." Hotchner pulled him from his tirade. "What happened?"

"Caroline was searching the master bedroom when the unsub's girlfriend came out of the closet. I heard the door slam and that was they only reason she's not dead yet. Your men were supposed to clear the house!" He screamed at the sheriff again.

"I'll take care of this. Go process the second suspect."

"I've got her." Caroline saw the look of concern in Derek's eyes as he came up to the car.

"Hotch asked me to process her."

"In other words, you damn near hit that local cop."

She knew him, even now after they hadn't been together in a year and a half, but he wasn't in the mood to admit it. "He almost got you shot, CJ." She didn't say anything, just gave him a look of understanding when she nodded and he took her hand as they drove.

"Garcia is going to be jealous if she ever finds out." She smiled as she looked over at him.

"There's nothing going on between Garcia and me."

"Oh." That was not the answer she was expecting. She'd seen the conversations between the two of them, the way they worked together, and the way he looked at her. She could have sworn that Penelope Garcia, their technology expert, was his newest conquest and now that he said she wasn't, the way he was holding her hand scared her. He was being over protective again. That was the main reason behind their breakup. She felt that he didn't trust her with the way that he always tried to protect her, not wanting her to go into the field, and acting like the typical macho agent. Between that and the constant distance that his assignments generated, it didn't work.

He caressed her hand with his thumb. "This is as a friend, CJ." He smiled. "Believe me, I learned my lesson." She laughed easily and finally relaxed.

A week later, that laugh was being stifled as she watched Dr. Reid at her range. "OK, it's obvious that Hotch has tried, but failed. Holster your weapon and we'll start from the beginning."

For the next hour, she fixed the way his gun was holstered, taught him how to clean it, and then finally took him back into the range to teach him to use it, which was almost comical because it appeared that he was afraid of his service weapon. She had to remind herself that not everyone grew up with a Colt in their hand.

"Spence," she smiled again as she put a hand on his shoulder, "close your eyes. Just hold the gun in your hand, don't try and fire it, just hold it. Get used to the weight, the feel, and then we'll go from there." After a minute, his grip eased and she was knew it was time to continue. "Good, now, drop the clip. I want you to get comfortable just pulling the trigger."

"How is this going to improve my shooting?"

"By making sure you don't flinch every time you pull the trigger because you are only as good as your next shot. Spence," she leaned against the ledge and looked him in the eye, "you'd be surprised how many agents anticipate the noise and have their shots go wild. This is how I walk them through it as well." She smiled. "There's nothing wrong."

Spencer looked away. "This isn't the way that Hotch was doing it."

"No, his style is different from mine, but he's always been comfortable with a weapon. It's foreign to him to see someone unable to lock and load. Now," standing up, she drew her weapon and ejected the magazine, "drop the clip and let's continue."

After another half-hour, she told him to reload. "I don't know what's changed."

"Except that you've now become much more comfortable with the trigger pull and now we're going to work on controlling your breathing. Spence, it's a three-step process and, unfortunately, there's no 'Shooting for Dummies' book out there." She got him to smile. "Look, if you want to take a break, we can pick this up next week."

Reid shook his head. "No, I want to learn this."

Caroline nodded. "OK, then just watch for a second." Reloading her Glock, she took aim, and proceeded to take three shots. "Did you see what I did?" He gave her a confused look. "I controlled my breathing and focused on the target, aimed using the front sight, and was able to come right back to the sweet spot after each shot. Give it a try." She watched as he took his time aiming, his face contorting as he tried to focus, and she placed her hand on his shoulder again. "Spencer, remember how you aimed when you shot the L.D.S.K.? Remember how it felt just like second nature? That's how it needs to be because you aren't going to have time to stand there and make sure you have the perfect shot." Grabbing her Glock again, she lined up her shot and then nodded to him to mimic her. "Both eyes open and just focus on the front sight. Pretty soon your eyes are going to adjust and be able to focus on both the target and the sight at the same time." She watched as he attempted to do what she had just said with a smile. "Good, now pull the trigger."

The shot rang out and, for the first time, he didn't jump. "How was that?"

"Good, but next time, don't stop after one. Empty the clip. You have to get used to returning to the sweet spot." He nodded and she placed a hand on his shoulder again. "Come on, that's enough for today. Let's clean and reload."

Morgan silently entered the firearms range at the end of the day and watched as Caroline swept the floor, clearing the brass from behind the ledge, clothed beautifully in a pair of blue jeans and a button down white silk blouse. "I can't believe they allow you to work with live ammo and look like that. It's amazing this whole place hasn't gone up yet." He smiled as she looked up and gave him a smile in return. "So, how'd it go with Reid?"

"I can't tell you that. You'll give him a rash."

"No I won't. I'm happy he's willing to learn since I have to trust that he has my back."

She walked up to him and smirked. "He's improving so now I can worry about you having his back." Drawing his weapon, he emptied the clip into the target at the end of the range. "Impressive. Nice groupings and a nice stance."

"I had a good teacher." Taking the broom, he swept up his casings. "So, I actually came down here to see if you wanted to grab some dinner."

"You don't have a case?"

"Not right now." She laughed and he smiled again. "What do you say? Dinner on me?" She nodded and locked up.


	3. Chapter 3

Friday morning, Spencer Reid walked into the firing range at precisely ten o'clock and found Caroline James already there and working with a rather large handgun. "A fifty caliber Desert Eagle I presume?"

Looking up at him, she smiled. For the past two weeks, he'd been coming for two hours every morning and she could finally say that he was comfortable with her. "Very good. I'm working a case with another group of agents and they needed a test fire. Are you ready?"

"I think so." He found himself smiling at her almost uncontrollably.

"Good, then go ahead in and empty your clip. I'll be there in a minute." There was a confused look on his face that she had come to recognize and enjoy. "Call it a Pop Quiz." She winked at him and watched him walk into the range.

"Did I pass?" Reid asked as he pulled in his target.

"Nice grouping and only one wild shot. I'd say you passed." She smiled and placed a new target in the clip. "Now, since you have the accuracy, we're going to work on your speed because…"

"You are only as good as your next shot." A voice came from the doorway. "You need to get a new line, Caroline." Hotchner smiled as he walked in.

"Hey, why fix what isn't broken?" She grinned. "What can I do you for, Aaron?"

"I'm here to rescue Dr. Reid from your boot camp."

"I guess this lesson can wait."

"It's going to have to. We leave for Denver in twenty minutes. Morgan will catch you up." He spoke to his agent who quickly nodded and left. "How's he doing?"

"Very well. He's a quick study." She smiled at her friend. "It was just a matter of a style change."

Hotchner smiled back. "Whatever works. Thanks, Caroline." Waving, he disappeared out the door.

Even though Hotchner had left, she still heard his voice. She heard him talking about Derek going back out into the field, into danger, and she felt a familiar knot in her stomach. Shaking her head, she pulled out her weapon and began shooting. It made her calm and got her to focus on something other than what she was feeling.

"Caroline?" Spencer called out as he walked into her lab Wednesday morning, but didn't get a response. "Caroline?" He looked into the range and was motioned to give her one minute so he stood and watched as Morgan stood at the ledge and fired his weapon, studying his stance, his focus, and his technique.

"Good. I have to say that it's up to you. The Bureau just wants me to get a hundred agents to switch to the Smith and Wesson just so we can evaluate them. You seem more comfortable with the Glock, but that's because you've had it for a few years. The Smith and Wesson seems to sit better in your hand though."

Morgan nodded. "I'm always up for something new. I'll give the Smith and Wesson a try." Looking up, he saw Reid and smiled. "Hey Reid. How's it going?"

"Well, thank you."

"Good. Let's see what you've got." Caroline shot him a look that told him he was out of line, but he just winked. "No pressure." He put up his hands. "Just as a friend."

Caroline laughed and rolled her eyes as Spencer stepped forward. "You don't have to do this. The only person you have to prove yourself to is you."

"And Hotch." Spencer nodded. "It's all right." Removing his weapon, he took aim and emptied the magazine.

"Not bad, Reid." Morgan extended his hand. "Good job."

"Thanks." He slapped the other agent's hand with a smile.

"Spence, give me one second." Grabbing Derek's hand, she pulled him into her office. "What in hell were you thinking? You need to lay off the kid. You're acting like a high school bully."

"Only because I want to see him excel. I want to push him to do better, be the best. That can't happen by hand holding and coddling him, CJ. There's a rapid pace out there in the field and he's not always going to have the best of conditions to react under. I don't want him freezing up when I need him to cover me."

She looked away and nodded. "You're right. I just don't want to see him retreat back into his shell. For almost three weeks, I have worked my ass off trying to get him to trust me, open up to me, and I don't need you jeopardizing that."

"I promise I won't." Leaning down, he kissed her with a smile. "How do I get you to defend me that vehemently?" She playfully smacked his stomach. "I'll catch you later." Kissing her one more time, he left as she laughed.

"I'm sorry about that." Caroline smiled as she walked back into the range.

"No problem. I'm used to him." Spencer smiled back. "He's the big brother I never wanted." He watched her laugh and it caused an unfamiliar knot in his stomach that he quickly dismissed.

"That is a great description of Derek." She placed a hand on his shoulder as they returned to the task at hand. "OK, let's work on your stance and speed."

"Morgan, you're friends with Caroline, right?" Reid asked that night as they walked out to their cars.

"Yeah. She and I have known each other for years. Why?"

"I was just wondering…" he looked down while he searched for the right words.

"How to ask her out?" Morgan grinned as he stopped him. "You have a thing for her?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Well, I'm pretty sure that she's seeing someone right now, but the best way to get to know her is to just become friends with her. Hang out together, join us for drinks one night after work, that sort of thing. She's not the type to go out with someone she doesn't know. She's a very reserved person."

He nodded. "Thanks." Reid went to walk away, but turned back to face the other agent. "Who's she seeing?"

"Don't worry about that. Just take my advice."

"Is it you? Gideon told me that you two dated a while back."

"Yeah, we're giving it a second try."

"Oh. OK." He nodded and walked away.


	4. Chapter 4

"Reid's got a thing for you." Derek teased as they made dinner that night. "He asked me the best way to ask you out."

"Oh no. I wasn't going for that."

He kissed the nape of her neck. "I know, but he's not exactly experienced in that area."

"What did you tell him?"

"That you were seeing someone, but he should still become friendly and get to know you." He wrapped his arms around her waist and began caressing her neck. "I told him that anything could happen."

"What? You think I'm going to walk away again?"

"It happened once."

"Because I felt smothered and that you didn't trust me to be able to take care of myself. You've changed that way of thinking now. I don't know how you did it, but you did it, and I'm happy." She turned around and kissed his lips. "Why? Do you want me to go out on a date with Spencer Reid?"

"I'd be curious as to how he'd treat you."

"You're jealous!" She laughed and kissed him. "There is nothing to be jealous about, Babe. I'm all yours." Kissing him again, she pulled away with a frown as she heard the phone ring, knowing it was going to be work related. "Hello."

"Hey Caroline. Is Morgan there?" Hotchner's voice came through the receiver.

"Yeah."

He was confused by her disappointment. "Caroline, you should be a pro at this by now."

"You think I would be, but I still don't like it." Kissing Derek one last time, she handed him the phone and returned to cooking.

"Have you ever been shot?" Spencer was asking one Monday morning as he sat and talked with Caroline in her office.

"Yes and I wouldn't recommend it.

He laughed. "I wasn't thinking that I wanted to get shot just to experience it."

"It sucks. Take it from me."

"What happened?"

"Which time? The first time, I was just grazed and the second time, the bullet went through my thigh and ended my field career unless they need a sniper or weapons expert."

Spencer stared at her in shock. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I've gotten over it." She sipped her coffee. "The first time, I was fresh out of the Marines and eager so I didn't take all the precautions I should have and allowed a suspect to get a round off before I could fire my weapon." Pulling up her sleeve, she showed him the scar on her upper arm. "The second, I could show you but they'd fire me for sexual harassment." She winked. "No, I was involved with a case with the BAU about three years ago and we were ambushed. We got faulty intelligence and even the best profile isn't going to stop a projectile traveling at twelve hundred feet per second." She shrugged. "It went into my thigh and just missed my artery. I got lucky that the other agents there thought fast and tied off the wound until the ambulance came."

"That's how you met Morgan?"

"Out of bounds, Agent Reid." Caroline said with authority, but lightly touched his hand. "Spence, my relationship with Derek is complicated and personal." She watched him nod and she took a deep breath, figuring it was time she told someone what had happened that fateful day. "Yeah, that's when Derek and I became close. He took off his belt, tied it around my leg, and stayed with me until the paramedics came. He saved my life."

"Did they catch the unsub who shot you?"

"The coroner did." She smiled. "I put a double tap in his heart. That guy wasn't getting away." She laughed until she saw Hotchner standing in the doorway. "I guess you've come to rescue Dr. Reid."

"More like I've come to rescue you." Hotchner smiled and walked into her office. "I was wondering if you would like to get back into the field for a little bit."

"Are you kidding?"

"I don't kid about stuff like this. Gideon has cleared you to be temporarily reassigned to our team while we're working on this case."

"What's going on?" Her smile was gone. Jason Gideon was the one who had reassigned her to a desk three years ago.

"There's a hostage situation in Annapolis and we've been asked to assist the Navel personnel."

"And you need a sniper." She nodded. "Good to know that I'm still needed for something." After checking her sidearm, she grabbed a key from her pocket and unlocked the cabinet behind her, pulling out the case with her long rifle. "Lock and load."

"Caroline," Gideon approached her as she readied her weapon, "you have a green light. If you find a shot that will take this guy down, do it."

"You don't want to try and talk him out?"

"He's been in there for almost twenty four hours." He eyed her carefully. "But that's not what this is about."

"Excuse me I have a job to do." She pushed by him and made her way up to the rooftop opposite the building. "Do I have a green light?" She asked into her radio, awaiting conformation from Hotchner before actually taking the beautiful shot she had lined up.

"No, position one. I repeat, red light. Gideon's in there."

Caroline looked through her sight and put Agent Gideon in her crosshairs, but quickly moved it. That wasn't who she was. She and Jason Gideon had had their moments, mostly they butted heads, which is probably why he wasted no time having her field status revoked after she got shot, but he respected her talent, her ability, and she knew that. That was what kept her from pulling the trigger, taking out both Gideon and the unsub. "Hotch, I've got the shot."

"Green light! Green light!"

With one squeeze of her trigger, she sent the .380 through the pane glass window and into the unsub's skull, dropping him in place. Not the neatest shot she'd ever taken, but she'd seen what she thought was a muzzle flash as she was lining up and she couldn't take the chance that the unsub had actually pulled the trigger.

"Good work, Agent James." Gideon leaned next to her on the car.

"Thank you." She dismantled her weapon, controlling her breathing.

"I would have thought you would have taken the shot earlier."

"I needed the green light from the Agent in charge."

"I thought I gave that to you."

"Before I knew all the players. Agent Gideon, telling me I have the green light before I'm in position would never hold up."

"How did it feel?"

"I only get a minor adrenaline rush that I'm able to control. It's my job."

"I mean to have me in your sight, to know that in a split second you had power over me."

"What? You're profiling me now?" She glared at him as she pulled her rifle case onto her shoulder.

"That's my job."

Derek looked over and read the body language between Gideon and Caroline, knowing their history, and he quickly intervened. "Everything alright here?"

"Yeah, fine. You boss is a real piece of work, Morgan." She walked away.

"You never answered my question." Gideon spoke softly as they packed up a few minutes later.

"Because it's a mute point, Jason. I did the job I was brought here to do, the job that I am trained to do. Emotions have no bearing on my work."

"You're not denying that you lined up that shot, are you?" He smiled the sly smile that he had when he knew what the other person was thinking.

"No, I'm not." She turned to look at him. "Because I did have you in my crosshairs. I had my finger on the trigger, but I didn't take the shot. You want to know why? Because, even though we have never really seen eye to eye, I respect you. I respect your talent and I know that you respect mine. Even though I resent you for removing me from the BAU three years ago, I couldn't take the shot. If this means that you're going to bring me up on charges, then so be it. I'm not sorry I did it. I'm just glad that the unsub didn't put a round in you because I know from experience how painful that is."

"No, the shot you saw went into the wall behind me. He was just trying to intimidate and show his power." He nodded and turned to leave. "Oh, I'm not going to bring you up on charges. I have no way of knowing if what you said is true. And I do respect your talent, Agent James." He smiled his trademark half smile and walked away.

"Why do you let him do that to you?" Derek asked from behind her.

"How much did you hear?"

"Enough to know that you let him get to you more than you should. He's damn good at pushing people's buttons when he wants to and he enjoys doing it with you."

"Because he knows that I'm a damn good field agent, Derek. Maybe I can't run the marathon anymore, but I still have the ability to be an asset to this team. The way he got rid of me wasn't called for."

"Gideon didn't ask to have you reassigned. I did." Hotchner's voice came from behind her. "I needed the team complete while you recovered and I made a judgment call. It was only supposed to be temporary. I never thought you would accept the desk job permanently."

"Why didn't you tell me, Hotch? Why did you let me believe it was Gideon for three years?" It didn't make any sense. Hotchner was the one agent from the BAU, besides Derek, that ever stopped by to see her, who ever stayed in touch.

"Jason wanted you to believe it was him. He was the one who suggested that Casey offer you the position as the head of ballistics. It was a promotion and it was what I thought was best."

"You were worried that I would go soft." She studied his eyes. "You were worried that I would hesitate going through a door?"

"Caroline, I didn't know and I had to make a judgment call. The brass asked if I thought you could still do your job in the field and I blinked."

She nodded. "At least I know now."

"CJ, I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I trust your judgment. If you thought I couldn't do my job, than I couldn't do my job." There was a look of confusion on his face. "My beef with Gideon is that he never questioned me when I was on the BAU. Aaron, you had no problem calling me out for screwing up, being insubordinate, and just generally getting out of line. I respect that. Besides, you trained me. If anyone knows what I am and am not capable of, it's you."

"Gideon enjoyed pushing your buttons because he felt it made you better, that it still makes you better." He smiled. "Cut him some slack, Caroline. He knows what he's doing." She nodded and he walked away.

"Come here." Derek sensed her emotions, though she didn't show them outwardly, and pulled her into his embrace.

"I had no idea." She sighed. "I guess I had a lot of growing up to do."

"And you did it." He kissed the top of her head. "CJ, you are a damn good agent. You just do your best work away from Gideon."

She laughed and pulled away. "That's the truth."

Two weeks later, Derek walked into the firing range to find it empty. "Caroline?" Suddenly, he heard the sound of gunfire and walked into the rifle range. "That looks like fun."

The lecherous look on his face made her laugh. "I have my sniper qualifications next week so I thought I'd brush up."

"Because you aren't here everyday doing this."

"No, I'm in the firing range with agents like you, in the ballistics lab with my nose down the scope, or teaching new recruits how a gun in real life isn't like the movies. Even I have to practice you know."

"Actually, I didn't, but I do now." He sat down next to her before leaning down and kissing her. "I know, not proper firearms safety."

"Not proper work etiquette either, but I'll let you slide today." She kissed him again. "So, what brings you down here today?"

"Can't I just come and see my girl without having another reason?"

She laughed. "You never have before. Why start now?"

"You know me too well, CJ." He grinned and reached into his front pocket. "Can you run this bullet?"

"What do you need to know?" She stood up and secured her rifle before walking with him back into her lab.

"Everything."

"Was there a casing?"

"That would make it too easy for you." He grinned as she rolled her eyes.

"Very funny, Agent Morgan." She put the bullet under the microscope. "You want to wait? I can page you when I find something."

"I'll wait."

"Looking at me like that is not going to make the information flow any faster." She quipped after a minute.

"Maybe not, but it will certainly make my day a lot brighter." He raised his eyebrows at her with a grin. "Do you have something for me?"

"Not what you want to hear, but it's from a Smith and Wesson .357. Someone is either thinking they're Dirty Harry or else over-compensating for their shortcomings. Also, they don't take very good care of their gun." She motioned for him to take a look. "I thought that was an anomaly with the bullet, but then I realized that it's burned onto it. You're going to want to take this to trace." Putting it back into the evidence bag, she handed it back to him. "Is this still the stalker case?"

"No, this is a cold case that the brass wants solved since they think it's attributed to Mark Forma."

"The serial we put away four years ago?"

"One in the same. He was just awarded a new trial based on a technicality and we don't want him getting out."

"I should have taken him out while I had the chance."

"Gideon would have never allowed that." He kissed her quickly and smiled. "I'll see you later."

"No you won't, but I'll leave the porch light on." She waved and shook her head. She knew how he got when he worked a case like this. Four years ago, neither one of them had slept for 36 hours while they worked up the profile and then found Forma. The case had been intense and she knew that the pressure to keep him in jail was going to be even greater now, so she knew she wouldn't see Derek except for at work, but she was ready for it this time. She wasn't jealous of him this time.


	5. Chapter 5

"CJ?" A very weary sounding Derek called that night.

"Hey Handsome. You don't sound so good."

"I'm beat."

"Then come home and I'll give you a massage then you can catch a few hours."

"As tempting as that sounds, I'm going to have to take a rain check. I just called because I needed a break." He sighed as he leaned back in his desk chair. "This guy is slick, CJ. This case fits his pattern, but there's practically no physical evidence."

"He was slick four years ago too and the evidence was fresh." She ached to wrap her arms around him, massage his shoulders, anything just to make him feel better. "Did trace come up with what that substance was on the bullet?"

"Yeah, it was a type of wax. No way to trace its origin."

"Didn't we find the last victim in the bottling plant of his parents' winery?"

"Yeah. Yeah, we did." The connection happened and he sat up, finding a second wind. "I love you! Do you know that? I love you! I'll have them run it against the wax found on the last victim's clothing." He went to hang up. "I owe you one, CJ."

Three months later, as she walked to her car after work, Caroline felt someone following her. When she sped up, they sped up, when she slowed down, they slowed down, and when she stopped, they stopped. Her training kicked in and she pulled her weapon as she ducked behind a stanchion. "FBI!" She jumped out and saw Spencer at the end of her sight. "Damn it, Spence! What were you thinking sneaking up on me like that? I damn near blew your head off."

"Hotch asked me to keep an eye on you from a distance. He's worried about the case we're working on."

"So he sent you to look after me? Why not just come to my office and put me in protective custody? And what in hell is going on?" Just then, she heard someone off to her left and took aim again.

"Because I knew you wouldn't go and this is a serious threat." Hotch said as he walked up. "You can put that away now."

She rolled her eyes and holstered her weapon. "What in hell is going on? Do you teach your team to sneak up on people in parking structures now?"

"It's the son of Jared Gibson. He was just paroled and he's made credible threats against you for taking out his father."

"The bastard shot me."

"And now his son is looking to finish the job."

"This isn't a BAU case, Aaron. You already know the profile of that psycho."

"You're one of us, Caroline. It's a BAU case." He put a hand on her shoulder.

"I can take care of myself."

"I know you can, but I'm serious about putting you into protective custody. I won't lose an agent under my command."

Caroline wanted to fight him, Derek could see it in her eyes, and he couldn't watch anymore. "Hotch, give me a minute? You too, Kid." He motioned to Reid. "CJ," he put his hands on her shoulders, "let us protect you. This guy is obsessed with you and thinks you murdered his father. He's not going to stop until he exacts some form of revenge."

"So I should put a team of agents in danger? Derek, I can look after myself. You of all people know that."

"I also know what really happened that night in the warehouse. You underestimated Jared Gibson. I don't want you making the same mistake twice because Ray won't hesitate and he has better aim than his father." He whispered and held her eyes.

"That's not fair, Derek. I wasn't the only one who hesitated to take the kill shot that night."

"I know, and we all learned our lesson, especially me. Let us make things right. We owe you, CJ. I owe you, CJ."

"You don't owe me anything. We were working a case. It went bad. There is nothing that changes that fact."

"Damn it, Caroline." He pulled away. "You are as stubborn as a mule!" He lowered his voice and put his hands back on her shoulders. "Caroline, I don't want to lose you. Ray Gibson is a sociopath. He's going to have no qualms about pulling the trigger and taking you out. I don't want to be standing over your corpse." There was a sad look in her eyes when she looked back at him and she nodded. "OK then." He smiled ruefully and kissed her before pulling her against his chest.

"You know the drill, Agent James. Stay away from all windows and doors and there's no going outside." Gideon briefed her as they assembled the team of agents at her house and she just nodded. "Good. There'll be a team of agents outside and Hotch and Morgan will be inside with you."

"I want Reid in here as well." She spoke softly as she looked over his shoulder at Spencer. "Why not use this as a learning tool?"

"Agreed." He nodded and called to his protégée. "Reid, there's been a change of plans. You're in here with Morgan and Hotch. Alright, let's do this people." He cleared the house.

"I'll put on a pot of coffee."

"Are you OK?" Hotchner leaned against the doorway to the kitchen. "What did Morgan say to you?"

"The truth." She smiled ruefully. "I guess it's just led me to relive that night four years ago."

"I've been there myself." He nodded. "Just remember we're the best at what we do. It's not going to happen again." She smiled at him.


	6. Chapter 6

Two hours later, the mood inside her three-bedroom two-bath ranch was much lighter. "OK, Spence, it's your turn. Do me proud." Caroline smiled from her position on the couch, safe in Derek's embrace. "There's a sniper in the area. Witnesses say that the victims all fell before anyone even heard a shot. What do you look for?"

"Why don't you give me a hard one?" Spencer laughed.

Hotch was actually finding that he was enjoying himself, but he never let his guard down. He smiled as he watched the exchange between his team, but it quickly turned to a frown when he heard something outside.

"Hotch, what is it?" Morgan stood up.

"The same car has gone by very slowly three times."

"It's Randall Childs at the end of the street. His son just turned sixteen and he's teaching him how to drive every night when he gets home from work." He looked at the clock. "It's about that time. They're about ten minutes late, but I'm thinking RJ had homework." Hotch looked at him and he just nodded.

"Aaron, why don't you go into the guest room and get some sleep? I'm sure Spence and Derek can take first shift." Caroline looked over at her mentor with a frown. He looked tired, haggard, nothing like she was used to seeing. "Between the three of us, we can handle anything that may come up. Besides, there's an army of FBI agents outside and across the street. We'll be fine."

"If I do that than I want you to as well. I want two agents on watch at a time."

"It's not a debate, CJ." Derek silenced the protest he saw in her eyes. "I'll stay out here with Reid." She nodded and he walked her back to their bedroom to make sure the shades were drawn, the windows were locked, and to kiss her goodnight. "I promise to play nice." She laughed and kissed him again. "CJ, I love you."

"I love you too." She smiled and watched him walk out.

"So you've been staying here a lot?" Reid asked as Morgan sat back down on the couch.

"I live here." Part of him wanted to tell the kid to back off, but he took a deep breath. Reid wasn't the enemy. "I moved in a month ago."

"Good for you. She's an interesting woman."

"Do you still have a thing for her?"

"I don't know." Reid thought for a moment. "She's a good friend."

"That she is." He smiled and pulled out a case folder to study.

Two hours later, the phone rang. "Hello." Morgan answered quickly.

"Hi Derek. Is my daughter there?" The familiar male voice came through the receiver.

"She's asleep, Rob. Can I have her call you back?"

"Is there something wrong?"

"We're just working a case that has us both on edge. I'll have her give you a call back in the morning." He hung up and sighed. "False alarm. It was Agent James' father. Stand down."

"This guy doesn't fit the profile to call anyway. I don't know why we're monitoring the phone." Reid tried to relax.

"Because we're not taking anything for granted this time, Reid."

"How's it been?" Caroline came out twenty minutes later.

"You're supposed to be asleep." He took her into his arms as she sat down. "And that's my shirt."

"It's your turn and I like this shirt. It's comfortable."

He laughed quietly and kissed the top of her head. "I'm not tired."

"Derek, please. Hotch will be up soon and Spence is here. I'll be fine."

"CJ, I'm fine. Hey, Reid, last door on the right is the second guest room. Why don't you go get some rest?" He looked over at the younger agent.

"No, I'm fine. Thanks." Reid looked up from the book he was reading.

"I guess you're stuck with both of us." She shook her head with a smile and he watched her long brown hair swaying with her head movement. Gently, he placed his hand on her cheek and kissed her. "I'm going to make sure that nothing happens to you this time."

"All of us are, Caroline." Reid smiled as he stood up and walked back to the bookcase.

"Reid, that's like the tenth book you've read tonight. You mean to tell me you can actually retain all of that?"

"Yeah, I can." He smiled before reading again.

"Spence," Caroline put her hands on his shoulders around midnight, "go get some sleep." She kissed his cheek before walking back to the couch. "You don't need to stay up to watch me sign ballistics reports."

"I'm fine. Thanks, Caroline."

"I'm sure you are, but you've read all but three of the books on my bookshelf and you look like hell. Go get some sleep. Hell, even Morgan crashed." She gestured to the man next to her with the case file open on his lap and his head back on the couch.

Spencer laughed. "I'll sleep in a little while. Right now, I'm not tired."

"And I'm J. Edgar Hoover." She rolled her eyes. "You have been spending too much time around the BAU." She stood up. "Then this is a pop quiz. Give me your weapon." The younger agent stood up to meet her and did as she asked. "Nice. I actually think you're one of my best students." She pushed the clip back in and went back to the couch. "I'm impressed at how far you've come."

"Thank you, but I do have a genius level IQ."

"Doesn't mean you have common sense enough to follow my rules." She laughed. "You'd be surprised at the number of agents who don't practice simple gun maintenance."

"You're a great teacher, CJ." Derek said groggily with a smile. "Don't let her get to you, Reid. She can be a real ball buster."

"Only because I hate having to examine the service weapons of agents killed in the line of duty." She looked over at him. "Babe, go back to sleep. I don't think this guy is coming tonight. Even Hotch went back into the guest room. Besides, Spence here is refusing to leave me alone, so I think I'm covered."

"No. You're stuck with me."

"I think I can handle that."

"But I can't." Hotchner's voice came from the hallway. "Morgan, hit the sack."

"I've been catching twenty here and there. I'm fine, Hotch. Kid, last door on the right."

Hotch quickly evaluated both agents and agreed. "Alright, Reid, I'm relieving you."

"I'm fine, Hotch."

"No, you're not, and when did a direct order become a debate?"

"OK." He took his weapon from Caroline.

"Under the pillow, Reid. You need to keep it handy at all times." She called after him.

"What?"

"You don't want your weapon being taken by the perp. You want it within reach at all times."

"Oh, OK."

"CJ, you need to stop coddling him." Derek whispered after he heard the door to the guest room close.

"I'm not coddling, I'm teaching."

"Caroline, you're coddling. He's an FBI agent just like Morgan and I." Aaron silenced her protest. "Let him go now. Let him sink or swim."

"Because that's your style?" She glared at her friend and mentor.

"Caroline. I'm all for walking someone through something, but I then back off. You're not going to be able to pull his weapon for him. Teach him the tools and trust that he'll know how to use them and when to use them. Caroline, you're a great teacher, it's why you are in the position you are, but you need to stop singling out pets."

Caroline sighed. "You're right, Aaron, but he still worries me. He's just a kid. He's had no formal training and he's allowed to carry a Glock. There's a part of me that is scared that he's going to take out a civilian."

Derek placed a hand on her thigh. "CJ, you did a great job with him. He'll be fine."

"As long as he doesn't get pulled into anymore pools." She rolled her eyes as the two men laughed. "I could have shot him."

"Yeah, well, he learned his lesson."

Around four am, the power suddenly went out and Caroline's backup generator came on. "Status." Hotch yelled into his wrist mike. "The lights just went out!"

Caroline hit the floor out of instinct and pulled her weapon as she heard the different agents report in from all sides of her house. "I'm going to get Reid. Cover me." She whispered to Morgan to which he nodded as he backed down the hallway.

"I heard the click." Reid whispered as he saw Caroline slink into the room. "He's right outside this room."

"West side. West side of the house." Morgan updated the agents before he heard what he thought was the front door opening. "Negative. Front door. Front door!"

The three agents bolted for the front of the condo, but realized they were too late when they saw a younger version of the man who shot her holding a gun to the head of Special Agent Aaron Hotchner. "Lower your weapons or I'll blow him away."

"You know we can't do that." Aaron answered. "And you won't take me out because you need me."

"Who says?"

"I do." Caroline holstered her weapon and stepped forward with her hands in the air. "Let Agent Hotchner go. You want me, Ray, not him. So, here I am. I'm unarmed and I'm walking towards you, ready to take his place. Let him go."

"Agent James!" Morgan yelled from behind her, but it was clear that she wasn't going to listen.

"How do I know that they won't shoot me as soon as I let him go? You people have itchy trigger fingers."

"Because I'm the one that shot your father, not them. They have nothing to do with this and I am standing in their line of fire. They'll have to shoot me first."

"Throw down your weapon and I'll let him go."

"OK." Slowly, she reached for her holster and she noticed Ray loosening his grip on Hotch so she took one step to the right and, as she had suspected, a shot rang out and Ray fell to the floor as Aaron twisted out of his grip.

"That was the dumbest thing I have ever seen you attempt, CJ, but it worked." Morgan said as he handed his weapon to Hotch. "I know the drill."

"Good work, Derek." Aaron turned to face Caroline. "I agree with him, Agent James, but if you ever pull something that stupid every again, I will personally take your badge."

"Point taken, Aaron, point taken."

"I thought you handled that unsub perfectly." Reid went up to her after the other two men had left.

"Yeah, but I broke protocol. I purposely stepped into the line of fire and blocked everyone's angle. I did it because I needed to gain his trust, but I would have balled someone out for doing that to me. It was the only way I saw of ending the situation without Hotch getting hurt." She smiled and put a hand on his shoulder. "Thanks for the vote of confidence though." It was as she pulled her hand away that she noticed it was still shaking and her stomach began doing loops. Quickly, she ran to the bathroom and shut the door.

"Here." Derek handed her a peppermint candy as she walked back out into the bedroom before pulling her to his chest. "Baby, IA is going to be here in about five minutes. Are you going to be OK?"

"I don't know."

At least she was being honest. He figured it was finally sinking in that Ray could have and should have taken her out, or possibly Hotch, before anyone could have gotten a shot off simply because she was standing in the way. "It's over. The guy is headed to the morgue and we can get back to our lives, at least after we replace the carpeting in the living room." He saw her smirk along with him as she pulled away. "That's better."


	7. Chapter 7

A week later, Internal Affairs cleared the shooting and Caroline went back to her lab, grateful to have her lab. She was suddenly unsure of her field ability when she wasn't behind her long rifle. Her lab was safe. Her range was insulated and kept her from fully hearing the voice in her head telling her to hand in her badge.

"Caroline?" Spencer knocked on her office door a month after the shooting. It had been slow upstairs so he decided to go see his friend. "Can I come in?"

Caroline leaned back in her chair. "Please. You need to rescue me from this paperwork." She was happy that Spencer had become so comfortable with her, coming to see her whenever he had the time. It had been hard at first to stop correcting him, to stop treating him as her student, but with time it had happened, and she had managed not to push him away.

"I just finished the last of mine." He sat down next to her desk. "I didn't want to be in here over the weekend."

"I feel the same way. You have plans?"

"Not really. The kitchen is being redone at my apartment so I'm staying at The Virginian…"

She glared at him. "Spence, that is the craziest thing I have ever heard. You are going to stay with me this weekend."

"No, I, um, wouldn't want to impose. Besides, Morgan…" Spencer stammered and looked at the floor.

"I don't care what Derek did or didn't volunteer. You are a friend, Spence. This is what friends do for each other." She found his eyes with a smirk. "What did Morgan say anyway?"

"No, nothing. No one knows what's going on. You see, I kind of had a minor kitchen fire about a week ago. It was really stupid what happened, but they've got to rip out the cabinets and replace them and repaint." He smiled at her.

"You didn't want to have to explain what happened. Let me guess. You got so wrapped up in researching something that you allowed your dinner to burn to a crisp."

"Something like that." He laughed slightly. "Really, Caroline, I don't mind staying at a hotel. In fact, I'm used to it."

"That is nonsense." Then she realized that maybe he wanted to be alone. "Unless you want to stay at the hotel?"

"I could go for some of your Chicken Parmesan." Spencer grinned.

"I thought so." She laughed again. "Then you go cancel your reservation and meet me back here in about three hours." She kissed his cheek as he walked out.

"Agent James," Derek burst into Caroline's office an hour later, "I need clarification on something. I just heard Reid canceling a hotel reservation for this weekend saying that he was going to be spending the weekend with a friend. That can only be one of two people, you or Gideon, and I'm pretty sure that, since he was talking to J.J., that he would have said that he was spending the weekend with Gideon, so that only leaves our house as the site of Dr. Spencer Reid's little weekend getaway. Am I right?"

"Yes, you are, because I couldn't see leaving him all alone in a hotel room for two days. We don't have any plans and we have two spare bedrooms."

"And I see this man everyday at work. I finally have a weekend off and I was hoping to spend it with my girl." He leaned down and kissed her tenderly. "Alone, if you know what I mean."

"Then you should have said something yesterday." She smirked at him and pecked his lips. "Because I'm not throwing Spence out just because you want to get laid."

"I was thinking we could go to your cousin's restaurant in Maryland and then see what happens from there." He caressed her cheek, but the look in her eyes told him that no amount of sweet talking was going to work. "But there will be other weekends for driving up to Annapolis and walking along the beach because we wouldn't want to see Reid spend the weekend all alone." Leaning down, he kissed her again. "Damn, CJ, when you pick a pet, you really spoil him."

"And I don't spoil you?" He just laughed and pecked her lips. "I'll be ready to go in about two hours."

"I'll meet you back here. I'm going to hit the gym." He smiled and walked out.

That night, Spencer watched as his colleague and his friend had an intimate moment after dinner. It was amazing to him to watch how Caroline was able to be so different away from the office and how Morgan was able to actually relax fully when he was with her.

"Here." Caroline gently stopped Derek from rolling his shoulder by massaging it. "Your shoulder acting up again?"

"No, I just think I worked out a little too hard." Her touch was so soothing.

"Yeah, you are a little tight. Go lie down on the bed and I'll be there in a minute."

He leaned down and kissed her softly. "Thanks."

"Don't worry about it, Babe." She smiled and finished loading the dishwasher. "Spence, I'll be back out in about fifteen minutes. Please, help yourself to anything and feel free to watch TV or do whatever you want. Our house is your house." She smiled.

"You have magic fingers, Baby." Derek managed to smile, but her hands were turning his aching muscles to soup.

"Thank you." Leaning down, she kissed his cheek with a smile. Massage therapy was something she'd picked up while she'd been laid up after her shooting. It was a handy tool to have since her thigh still pained her from time to time, but it seemed to come in handy more for Derek these days. He was pushing himself harder and harder, and she couldn't quite figure out why. "I love you, Babe." She smiled again as she stood up, Derek sound asleep on the bed, as he always was after she finished with him. "He should be out for about a half-hour." Caroline said as she sat down next to Spencer on the couch.

Spencer smiled. "How do you two do it? How do you keep a relationship going when we are almost never home?"

"We have made the commitment that when we are together, we are together, and there is no thinking or worrying about what we left at the office. We try like hell to keep that world from coming in the front door. Does that mean that Derek doesn't talk to me about the serial killer case you just closed when he gets home? Of course not, but it means that he doesn't let it cloud the weekend and I don't ask any questions about it. We work because we know that we are each other's port in the storm." She shook her head. "Am I making any sense considering how many clichés I'm using?"

"You make perfect sense." He laughed with her as they fell silent for a few minutes. "Caroline, what are you working on?"

"Hmm?" She'd been so wrapped up with the files on her lap that she hadn't even noticed him watching her, or the fact that she'd laid an open folder against his thigh. "Oh, I am so sorry. I'm so used to sharing this couch with Derek that I didn't even think about it." She quickly gathered her papers. "I'm just getting ready for the next few weeks. I'm going to be chained to my range."

"Ah, it's that time of year, is it?" Derek's voice came from behind her. "And, Reid, just move her things to the coffee table next time she does that, don't let her bother you." He smiled before kissing her lightly and then flopped down in the recliner. "I'm just used to it because I'm usually watching the game."

"Oh, I don't mind, I was just wondering what she was working on. What did you mean by 'it's that time of year'?"

Derek grinned and winked when Caroline shot him a look. "I'd tell you, but then CJ would kill us both."

"Oh." Spencer thought about it and then fell silent. "Oh, it's that time of year."

"Thanks, Derek. I could lose my job if anyone found out." Caroline glared at her lover.

"Don't worry, CJ, we're not going to tell anyone. Besides, if they wanted to really keep it a secret, they wouldn't make it the same time every year and make you schedule the BAU first." Derek put his feet up and flipped on a baseball game.

"I didn't know you were told to schedule the BAU first." Spencer questioned her.

"Yeah, the deputy director always tells me to schedule the firearms proficiencies for the BAU first because you guys are so hard to nail down in one place. I guess Derek's right, though. If they really wanted to make this like a pop quiz, they'd change things up a bit." Reaching over, she got Derek's attention. "And yours will be a surprise, Babe, because I can't administer the exam. So, yours may not be until the end."

He looked at her confused. "Why in hell would they single me out?"

"I haven't the foggiest idea, Babe, but I think it may have something to do with the fact that we share a bed."

"I didn't think of that, but what the deputy director doesn't know is that you don't take any crap from me. You'd probably fail me if I even smiled at you during the exam, CJ."

"Yeah, well, I was just told that someone else will be handling your proficiency and I didn't fight John. It wasn't a hill worth dying on. I did fight for you, Spence. John wanted me to hand yours off, but I fought to keep you in house."

"They thought that you would be too easy on me?" Spencer actually found himself laughing. "He really doesn't know you, does he?"

"John is…" Derek started but just rolled his eyes with a huff and let the subject drop.

"You can call the deputy director by his first name?" Spencer was shocked at Derek's response.

He rolled his eyes again. "Don't get too impressed, Reid. The man's a…"

"Hey, stop it." Caroline saw the anger about to bubble over and gently placed her hands on his shoulders as she stood up. "Who's winning?" She kissed his cheek.

All it took was her touch to calm him down. She knew what type of man her boss was and she knew exactly what he'd said about their relationship, but she didn't want it to affect them, she didn't want it brought into their house. "I'm OK." He kissed her hand before she pulled away.

"I didn't mean to upset you, Morgan." Reid quickly stumbled.

"It's not you, Kid." Derek looked over at him. "The man just gets under my skin because he stepped to me in my own home and told me that he didn't like that a black agent was dating a white agent. I didn't even get that from CJ's father."

"Daddy was just upset that you weren't a Marine." Caroline smiled a small smile. "It's in the past, Babe. We've moved on. Please, just let it go." She moved to sit on his lap and kissed him. "Derek, let the man be a racist pig. We don't have to let him have any meaning in our lives."

"I'm fine, CJ." He smiled ruefully and nodded. "It's just fresh, you know what I mean? I'll be fine."

"When was he here?" Spencer questioned, but hesitated when Caroline glared at him.

"About a month ago, right after the shooting, he invited himself over to talk to us. Up until then, we'd been really good about keeping our relationship out of the office. We didn't hide it, but when we had to put CJ in protective custody, it was lit up for all of Quantico to see." Derek sighed and went back to watching the game as he pulled Caroline closer, her head neatly resting on his shoulder as she curled up with him.

Reid watched the two agents together. There was an unspoken communication going on between the two of them. Caroline held Morgan's right hand as his left stroked her long brown hair. There was a part of Spencer that almost wished that he could take Derek's place, but as he studied them, he knew they were good for each other and they fit, something that he would probably never be able to achieve with Caroline.


	8. Chapter 8

"Dr. Reid," Hotch walked up to his desk two weeks later, "please come with me." He led the younger agent down to the now familiar office. "Agent James, are you ready?"

Caroline placed her pen down and stood up. "Of course, please come in." She waited until the door closed before continuing. "Dr. Reid, as you know, your proficiency last year was conducted by Agent Hotchner alone, this year, there is a new standard in place. The first part you completed last week in the form of the paper exam and the second part will be conducted in the range behind me. You will be asked to present arms; I will inspect the maintenance of your service weapon and backup, if you choose to carry one. You will then be asked to commence firing. You will have four shots to come as close to the center of the target as you can. Agent Hotchner and I will be evaluating your performance and your reaction time. Are there any questions?"

"No, Ma'am." It was very hard for him not to smile at the way she came across as a Marine.

"Good, then we will proceed into the range. And a word to the wise, Dr. Reid, if that smirk is not gone by the time we walk in there I will fail you faster than you can blink. Am I understood?"

"Yes, Ma'am." This time, the smile was gone.

It always amazed her how easily she was able to slip back into her Marine training. Her stance in the testing range mimicked the way she used to stand when she was a drill sergeant and she gave Reid the same disapproving look that she would give the 19-year-old recruits at boot when she saw that his weapon wasn't as clean as she had taught him. "Dr. Reid, you are aware that you can be asked to present arms at any time, correct?"

"Yes."

"Then explain to me why this weapon hasn't been cleaned in at least two weeks."

"We've been away on cases."

"That is not an excuse, Reid." Hotchner jumped in. "Make sure you bring your cleaning kit with you from now on." He shot a look at Caroline who just nodded.

"Good, now," she placed his weapon on the counter in front of him, "put your weapon back together and fire at will. You have four shots to show me you've improved since last year." The speed and accuracy that Reid displayed caused her to smile slightly, though she made sure he never saw it. "Nice job, Dr. Reid. You are excused."

"I'd say he passed with flying colors." Hotch smiled as they sat down in her office after Reid left. "I guess it's clear that my teaching methods didn't work and yours did."

"It's not a competition, Aaron. I've just done it before with pimple-faced teenagers from Ohio who have never even seen a weapon before much less fired one. I knew what to do to make him comfortable." She smiled finally. "And I'd say that he passed, but not with flying colors. I want you to give him a pop quiz from time to time to make sure that his weapon is operational. I've seen too many marginal weapons come through this lab after officer involved shootings."

"I will keep on top of him as much as time allows. Caroline, he can take care of himself." She nodded and he left.

"Agent James, Hotch said you wanted to see me?" Morgan stuck his head in her office later that same afternoon. It had confused him as to why he wasn't escorted down by Hotch and Gideon considering there was no way that the powers that be were going to let her conduct his exam alone.

"Yes, come in." Again she stood up and resumed her military posture. "SSA Morgan, please have a seat."

"I prefer to stand if that's alright with you." It had to be serious if it had her calling him by his title.

"Agents Gideon and Hotchner will be joining us in a minute, but I wanted to take an opportunity to speak with you in private regarding your test scores." There was suddenly a concerned look in his eyes. "Agent Morgan, as you know, I have been working in my position for over three years and I was a sniper instructor in the Marine Corp before that, so I have seen a lot of things in my career. It is very rare to come across what I saw when I pulled up your test results so I had a discussion with your supervisory agent and he agreed." She raised her eyebrow at him with a smirk. "Derek, you are only one of ten agents in this entire building to receive a perfect score on the first part of your exam."

He let out a deep breath. "Don't scare me like that, Woman."

She laughed. "It wasn't my idea to present it like that, but I can't say that it wasn't fun."

"Yeah, it was a barrel of laughs."

Just then there was a knock on her office door. "Enter."

"Did you tell him?" Hotchner walked in with a smile and Caroline nodded. "Morgan, you are the only member of the BAU to receive a perfect score."

Caroline resumed her military posture, her smile gone. "Now that your supervisor is here, Agent Morgan, what do you say we continue with your examination?"

"Yes, Ma'am." The smirk was evident for only a second as he returned to the business at hand.

"Very nice, Agent Morgan, you may return to your desk." Caroline nodded at the end of the exam before walking back to her office with Hotch. "Thanks for observing, Aaron. I didn't want to hand this one off, especially after seeing his test scores."

"And I didn't want to wait to administer his proficiency in December. It was a win-win situation." He smiled. "So, which of my agents gets the whistle?"

"Not a single agent of the BAU is losing their privilege this year."

"I'll need that in writing."

"I'll e-mail you my reports in about two hours."

That night, Derek came home and cornered his lover in their kitchen, wrapping his arms around her waist as she reached into the cabinet for the dinner plates. "How did you manage to convince them to allow you to be in the same range as I was?"

"I wasn't, Hotch was, and you were as well, given your test scores." He began caressing her neck as she turned around to allow him better access. "And you were the only one of the ten who aced the exam to ace the proficiency. I hope you know what kind of turn on your massive brain is."

"Just my brain?" He smirked with a raised eyebrow.

She pulled away. "What? You wanted me to say your perfectly honed physique? While aesthetically pleasing, beauty fades with time. Intellect and personality are far more attractive traits. Though, I must admit that I am damn lucky to have found the holy trinity." She went back to him and wrapped her arms around his neck before he kissed her. "Don't start something you don't intend on finishing, Agent Morgan."

"I never do." He caressed her neck once more as he pinned her against the counter. She was like no other woman he'd ever met. She was the perfect combination of brains and beauty and yet she always told him that he was the intelligent one in their relationship. The way she was able to portray her confidence and support without making it seem like she was simply stroking his ego fascinated him.

Pulling his shirt over his head, she tossed it onto the kitchen floor as he pushed hers to her shoulders, his hands caressing her skin as he exposed it, sending white hot lightning coursing through her before finally pulling it off her body. It had been three weeks since they'd been able to complete their lovemaking and they were both ravenous. What was normally a controlled fire was now a raging inferno neither of them could tame even if they wanted to.

Their clothing was no match for their passion and, as he removed her panties, she wrapped her legs around his waist, plunging his throbbing manhood deep within her depths, causing her to moan and arch her back, and he found her ample cleavage, laying passionate kisses against it until he found her mouth again when they established their rhythm. When she peaked, her breath caught in her throat and when it came out it was a deep moan followed by his name. Her body shuttered once more when she felt him explode and they kissed deeply just as Derek heard his cell phone ring. "Morgan." It didn't quite come out as authoritative as he would have liked, but he wasn't concentrating on the phone, he was focused on his amazing lover and best friend.

"Morgan, I'm sorry, but we have a case." J.J. heard the second person in the background and knew that the soft sound she was hearing were delicate kisses. Her heart silently ached, paining to be pulling him away from his girlfriend as they'd spent precious little time with their families over the last month that to be pulled away again wasn't easy. "We're wheels up in an hour."

"I'll be there in thirty." He closed the phone and kissed Caroline. "CJ…"

"I know." She smiled ruefully. "Just come home to me."

"I always will." Kissing her one last time, he ran to take a shower and repack his bag.


	9. Chapter 9

Four days after arriving in Dallas, Hotchner knew they were handicapped when it came to the unsub they were after. He was well armed and familiar with the outlying areas of the city. There was only one thing left to do. "Make the call, Morgan."

"This is Caroline." She answered the phone groggily when it rang at three in the morning on Saturday.

"How fast can you be in Dallas?"

"Give me five minutes to get ready and I can be at the airport in about fifteen. What's going on, Derek?" She was awake and out of bed, dressing as he briefed her. "I'll track this guy all the way to Canada if I have to. I'll see you in a few hours."

"You know I love you." Derek smiled as he leaned against the police station wall.

"That's only because I'm bailing your butt out of a jam again."

He laughed. "You know it."

Three hours later, Derek showed her into a conference room where all six agents of the BAU were discussing the case. "Morgan briefed me on the way from the airport." She placed her rifle case in the corner and walked over to examine the photographs and maps strewn about the table. "It is very strange for a marksman of this caliber to change weapons more than I change outfits."

"And he's leaving them at the scene. That's what I don't understand." Hotch shook his head as he walked to the coffee maker.

"He's sending you a message." Caroline answered. "He's telling you that he can kill with anything. It's a bold move, but the guns are untraceable, so it's a safe move. He's targeting hikers because there are less people around to hear the shot, but also because it takes skill and timing to take out a moving target on varied terrain. When I was stationed here with the Marines, we would train in the woods for that exact reason. I'm just curious as to where he's getting all these firearms without raising a red flag." She pulled out her cell phone. "I have a friend at ATF who owes me a favor." Standing up, she walked outside.

"What's the word?" J.J. came up behind her as she hung up.

"There's a dealer on the western edge of the city, near the base, that is smack in the middle of an active ATF operation. She's allowing us to have first crack at him once they bust him, but it has to be now." At that moment when she walked back into the conference room, she was grateful she'd taken the promotion. "Here's the scoop, I'm going in to make a buy, and ATF is setting up that angle. Morgan is inside with me, Hotch and Gideon will be outside in the truck. Once the magic words are said, ATF bounces in and takes him down. ATF is only allowing us an hour with him, so ask your questions wisely. If he gives us anything, they'll put in a good word, but he's looking at the death penalty for what he's done."

"Let's do it." Hotch snapped everyone to attention, but blocked Caroline's path. "Agent James, make no mistake. This is a BAU case."

"It's still your case, Aaron. I'm just getting you a lead you can use. You called me in because you are up against some serious firepower and I've actually handled some of the weapons your unsub is using to kill these women. I'm not looking for glory, just a little faith."

"Looks like rain out there." Morgan spoke the code words as the pawn shop dealer approached him an hour later.

"It'll just be a passing shower." The dealer nodded and motioned for him to join him, but balked when he saw the woman joining them. "Hey, Buddy only told me about one, not two, and certainly not a woman."

"I'm the buyer, he's the bankroll." Caroline glared at the greasy-haired little punk. "You don't like it; we can take our business elsewhere." On cue, Morgan tapped the briefcase he was carrying and they began to walk out only to be called back in. "Good, now that that's out of the way. Let's get down to business."

"What sort of business are you looking to do?"

"What have you got?" Morgan asked.

"What do you need?"

"Heavy artillery that's untraceable." Caroline answered in a whisper.

"Follow me."

Criminals were so stupid, she thought to herself as he led them into a back room filled with wooden crates marked as Marine-issued. "I can get handguns at Wal-Mart, Charlie. I'm looking for something a little more serious." He just smirked at her and opened another crate. "I didn't even think they made these machine guns anymore." She reached into the box to pick one up, but the twit slapped her hand.

"Hey, you want us to buy; you let the lady inspect the merchandise." Morgan stepped closer. From what he could see, the weapons in the crate looked like something out of a bad Sylvester Stallone movie, but Caroline picked one up, checked the breech, and lined up a shot.

"Have you got the armor piercing rounds to go with these bad boys?" She questioned with a look of childish glee.

"Of course." Charlie threw open the crate to her left. "How much to do you want?"

"We'll take it all." Morgan said the code phrase and drew his weapon as the doors were suddenly broken down with their backup. "FBI! Get on the ground and put you hands behind your head."

"I'm glad I caught you." Morgan placed his hand on Caroline's shoulder as she picked up her bags two hours later. "The unsub took J.J. hostage. I hope you brought your tools."

"How did it happen?" She dropped her luggage back into the SUV and slammed the rear hatch closed before jumping into the passenger seat.

"The guy came walking in off the street in a Marine uniform looking for the FBI agents working on the case. A rookie cop directed him to J.J. since she was the only one left in the building. The unsub drew a weapon, put it to her head, and now he has Agent Jarreau as his human shield." Morgan slammed the Suburban into gear. Caroline was the best sniper he'd ever worked with and that moment all he wanted was for her put one round into the guy's head.

"Agent James, I need you on the roof." Hotch pointed to an adjacent building. "You have my permission to take the shot when you have it."

"Maybe I can talk him out. Send me in there. I'm a Marine, I speak his language."

Hotchner glared at her. "When did a direct order become a debate, Agent James?"

Unbuttoning her blouse, she pulled out her dog tags. "Since I wear these and you don't, Agent Hotchner. This lunatic may just let her go if I give him a direct order. He seems to want to be a Marine, so let's treat him like a Marine. I am still a Lieutenant Colonel in the Marine Corp. I might be able to get him to release J.J. without putting her at risk by firing through a plate glass window."

Hotchner rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Alright, but if this goes south…" he let the threat fade, he knew she was right.

"I said no one comes in!" The unsub screamed at the door.

"Gunnery Sergeant, I am Lieutenant Colonel James, and I am coming in." She gave her best drill instructor glare and opened the door to the squad room.

"You don't look like no Marine I've ever seen."

Caroline pulled out her dog tags again. "That's because I am working as an FBI agent now."

"So you're a weekend warrior?" He said, alluding to her reserve status.

"That's enough! I was active until five years ago. Where were you when the world stopped turning? Me? I was being deployed to Afghanistan for six months, so don't talk to me about being a real Marine, Maggot! You are just a disgrace to that uniform. Now, let the woman go! Real Marines do not need woman as their shields. Am I understood, Maggot!" She screamed at him as she moved in closer, her training showing through, and her nerves turning back to steel as her head hoped it would work.

"Ma'am, Yes, Ma'am!" He let the blonde go and she ran out of the room.

"Now, lay down your arms." He kept the nine millimeter trained on her. "I said drop your weapon, Maggot!" She moved closer, still holding his eyes as she drew her weapon. "Drop it or I drop you!" He finally complied when she pressed her service pistol against his forehead. Every muscle in her body wanted to pull that trigger, but she fought it. "Get down on your knees, remove your uniform shirt, and put your hands behind your head." He just stared blankly at her. "Do it, Maggot!" She screamed at him as her back up arrived. He still didn't comply and she reached out and grabbed the ribbons off of his chest. "This will be the last time you disgrace that uniform. Am I understood?" Then she watched Hotchner put the cuffs on him. "Wait! Take that shirt off of him. There is press out there and this maggot is not a Marine!" She tried to rip the shirt off of him, but Morgan held her back. "He is not a Marine! He is a disgrace to the uniform! He is not a Marine!" They led the unsub out of the room. "I watched good men die honoring that uniform and now the FBI is allowing the American people to see a man in a Marine uniform being arrested. He is not a Marine!"

"I know, but we can't show a half-naked man being arrested." Morgan spoke in a low calm voice, but it didn't seem to calm her.

"Don't you think that would be better than showing someone dishonoring all the men and women who fight for this country?" She glared at him and broke free from his grasp. "Let go of me. I'm fine."

As they watched her storm out of the room, Reid made a move to follow her, but Morgan caught his arm. "Let her go, Kid. Right now, she doesn't need you or me. She needs to be by herself to decompress."

"You aren't worried about her?"

"I'm terrified, Reid, but right now, anyone in her path is just going to aggravate things. Just let her calm down and she'll talk to you when she's ready."


	10. Chapter 10

An hour later, back at the hotel, Caroline found herself pacing her room with thoughts that scared her. The same thoughts she'd had before she joined the Bureau and the same thoughts she thought she had buried five years ago. The ride back to the hotel had been made with her sitting on the floor of the Suburban while Morgan drove in silence. She didn't even know if he knew she was there, and she didn't care. She needed to be alone, but being alone caused her to think a little too much. "You want to go for a walk?" She asked as Morgan opened the door.

Derek watched her face as they walked out to the parking lot behind the Suburbans. "What's up?" He wanted to reach out for her, but he could read by her body language that she was still too tense.

"I just, um, wanted to give you an apology of sorts, I guess. I was out of line by wanting that guy to strip."

"You don't have to apologize to me, CJ. I know where it came from."

"No, you don't." She stopped pacing and glared at him for a second before resuming her movement with a shake of her head. "I'm not big on talking about things, you know that, but I think you need know where tonight came from because I need to tell someone." He just nodded at her and leaned against the SUV. "Do you want to know why I joined the bureau five years ago? Why I left the Marine Corps? It was because of my six months in Afghanistan." She took a deep breath before continuing in an effort to keep the tears from falling once more. Marines never cry, or so she told herself. "I was part of the team that took Kabul. I was stationed on rooftops for weeks living on nothing but K-Bars and water. It wasn't glamorous, but it was my job, and I was damn good. It got so that I didn't even need the radio to tell me who to pick off and I could drop someone from five hundred yards away, but soon I had watched too many of our men be taken out and I couldn't seem to keep up. Men all wearing the same uniform that son of a bitch was wearing tonight!" She screamed as she stopped pacing and stared back at him, but her tone softened as she again resumed her walk to nowhere. "But the funny part is that I'm no different than that asshole, Derek. I wore that same uniform and pulled the trigger on hundreds of people."

The silent tears streamed down her face as she spoke, something he had never seen from her before. Even when she was shot in the thigh three years ago, even as he held her hand and kept her conscious, she never cried. "There is a major difference between you and that madman, CJ. You only pull the trigger as a last resort. I have never once seen you pull the trigger without a valid reason. You never did it in a moment of anger or to prove your ability."

"You don't get it!" She screamed at him again. "Derek, I kill people for a living and I am damn good at what I do! There is a very fine line between what I do and what that maggot did to those women. Who's to say that I'm not going to become him? Who's to say that I'm not going to snap and start picking people off on the highway one day?"

"Because I won't let that happen, CJ."

"I called my father tonight after the op." She shook her head with a sarcastic laugh. "And you know what he said? He said ditch the FBI and go back to training recruits at 29 Palms. Like that's going to help me. Like I'm really going to go back to train more people to do what I do, to blur the line between right and wrong for a living, but he's right." She stopped pacing again. "Derek, I don't know how to do anything else. The FBI was my ticket out of the Marines, but I have nowhere else to go. I've had a firearm in my hand from the time I was three. I learned how to shoot before I learned how to read. I'm trapped in this vicious life." Her hysteria boiled over and she began crying uncontrollably. "I kill people and then go home and sleep like a baby. What's wrong with me? I was in my room tonight and thinking that the only way out was to eat my gun. It's the coward's way, but it's the only way to make it stop, Derek, and it's the one shot I couldn't take!"

He quickly pulled her to his chest and held her as they both collapsed onto the pavement. "That's because you're not a coward, Baby, and you did the right thing. I'm here now, you're safe. Hold on to me. Just grab hold of me and never let go." Her hands clutched his t-shirt as she wailed and he held her as tight as he could. He was never going to let her fall.

It was a few minutes before she was able to regain her composure. "Derek, you can't tell anyone about this, not even Hotch. Please, I'll lose my job."

Leaning down, he kissed her when he saw the fear in her eyes. "It stays between us, but you really should talk to someone."

"Yeah, and watch my field privileges be yanked again? No thanks." She stood up. "I'm fine now."

"Next time, don't wait so long before you tell me what's inside that pretty little head of yours." They walked back to the hotel, but he wouldn't let her go back to her room. "You're bunking with me tonight, CJ."

"We can both get into a lot of trouble, Derek." She whispered.

"I'm not letting you out of my sight."

"This is what I didn't want. I am fine now. Thank you."

"I am not being overprotective, CJ. I just want my girl to spend the night with me." He pulled her through the door with a soft smile.

The morning light found her still encompassed in Derek's strong embrace. It was the one place in the world she felt safe and that was exactly what she had needed the previous night. "Morning, Babe." She kissed him lightly as she caressed his rippled stomach and chest.

"Good Morning, Beautiful." He smiled as she kissed him again. "What do you think you're doing? We're still in the field."

"Maybe, but it's only five am and we aren't wheels up for another few hours so, I figured, we might just have enough time to have a little fun before anyone comes looking for us."

He kissed her lips and quickly caught her hand before she could slide it down to her destination. "Baby, I think we would both be better off if we kept this professional while we're in the field." He kissed her lips before flashing a wild grin. "I'll take a rain check though."

"Mmm," she pushed him onto his back, straddling his waist, as she kissed him, "don't wait too long to collect." She smiled and went back to her room.

The entire flight back home, Derek watched Caroline. Though he didn't want her to see it, he was still concerned about what she had said the previous night. He'd seen her get into a dark mood, but he'd never seen her become as distraught and depressed as she had been in that parking lot and even though her mood seemed to have improved, she was different. Whether or not she noticed it herself, she had changed. She sat a little closer to him in the car to the point that their thighs touched, something she would have never allowed to happen before. Then there was the fact that she came on to him in the hotel room, which completely violated her own code of not mixing business and pleasure. It worried him the way she seemed to be holding on to him a little tighter in some ways and pulling away in others, and after watching it for a week, he knew he had to find out what was going on in her head. "Reid, you got a minute?" He cornered his colleague in the coffee room one night.

"Sure, what's up?"

"It's CJ. I'm worried about her." He ran his hands over his face. "I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I need you to talk with her. There's something going on in her head that she's not telling me and she is way too sensitive about me being overprotective and controlling for me to ask her what needs to be asked. So, could you take her for coffee some night as a friend and see what's going on?"

"Yeah, sure, but why don't you ask Hotch? He knows her better."

Derek began to whisper. "Reid, she told me something in confidence in a moment of weakness, that if I tell Hotch, he's going to have to order a workup on her and it'll ruin her career."

"And your relationship, I got it." Reid nodded. "As long as you won't hurt me for taking your girlfriend out on a date, I will be happy to do it." He grinned as Morgan laughed.

Two days later, Caroline smiled as she sat down at the little outdoor café opposite her friend. "I'm really glad you called. Derek has a mountain of paperwork to get through and I didn't feel like sitting home alone. So, what's up?"

"Nothing's up, I just wanted to talk with you outside of the Bureau."

She noticed how he seemed to be more nervous than usual and he could barely look her in the eye. "You are a terrible liar. Something is up, Spence. What's going on?"

"Nothing is going on, I promise. I just wanted to have a chat with a friend. We haven't been able to talk since Dallas."

He had a point, but there was an ulterior motive that he was hiding from her. "Spencer, I don't have to be a profiler to know that you are bullshitting me. What's going on?"

"You caught me." He smiled nervously. "I've been thinking about you and thought that you might want to have coffee, CJ."

"I like that you are finally calling me CJ, just don't let Derek hear you. He likes to think that it's his exclusively." She laughed and they shared another hour of light conversation before they parted with a friendly hug.

"How'd it go?" Morgan answered his cell curtly.

"She's doing some soul searching, Morgan, but I don't think she's suicidal. I think you were right to worry about her though. I think she's going though a bit of a crisis of conscience."

"Thanks, Kid. I owe you one." He hung up as Caroline walked in the front door. "How was your date with Reid? Should I be worried about the competition?" He grinned.

"You tell me, Babe. That was just him on your cell, wasn't it?" Her eyes glared at him as his smile disappeared. "Derek, next time you want to profile me, talk to me. Don't get Spencer involved."

"Baby, you've pulled away every time I've tried talking with you." He went to her and took her hands. "CJ, last week you scared me. I have never seen you cry before that night. I was with you when you were shot, helped you during your physical therapy, and you never shed a tear, never even got choked up, yet you were hysterical last week in the parking lot. Baby, whether you've seen it or not, you've been clinging to me, and trying to pull away at the same time. I couldn't go to Hotch because I gave you my word, but I thought that Reid could handle subtly broaching the subject."

"No one has ever accused Spence of being subtle and I have never been accused of being the easiest person to deal with." She wrapped her arms around his waist, pressing herself to him. "Babe, last week opened my eyes to something that I have never seen before and it scared me. I don't scare easily, but when it happens, it's not a simple thing for me to get over."

"Caroline, Baby Girl, when are you going to figure out that you can't get rid of me no matter how hard you try? I'm not going to let you push me away this time. Even if that means that I have to rely on Reid gathering information for me."

Caroline rolled her eyes as she pulled away. "Yeah, well, I'm going to need to punish you for that."

"Oh, hurt me, Baby."

"I may have to." She went back to him, his strong and muscular arms embracing her, and securing her in the one place she felt safe. "But not right now." She sighed.

They sat down on the couch, his arm still around her, and he kissed the top of her head. "Baby Girl, this is what I'm talking about and I don't even think you know you're doing it." She looked up at him with fire in her expressive blue eyes. "CJ, Lord knows I would rather have you up here in my arms than locked away down in your range, but this isn't you. The strong, independent, self-confident woman I fell in love with is slowly slipping away and I'm at a loss as to how to stop it because I don't know what I'm fighting." Derek gently touched her face. "I can sit here and tell you just how different you are from that unsub we took down last week, but I'm going to be wasting my breath if you don't believe it, so, please, Baby, tell me how I fix it this time because I'm not going to go through the pain of losing you again."

"Derek," she stood up and walked to the window, keeping her temper in check, "there is a lot about me you don't know and I'm pretty sure that it would scare you if you did."

"Caroline, have you forgotten that I work for the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the FBI? I don't scare easily."

"This time you might."

"CJ, talk to me." He placed his hands on her shoulders and she turned around to face him just as the phone rang. "Don't move."

She caught his arm and kissed his lips. "I'll still be here when you get home." He kissed her deeply and she smiled as she watched him turn into Supervisory Special Agent Derek Morgan.

A week later, Derek dropped his bag by the front door and quietly made his way back to their bedroom. He was the one who had pushed for them to leave right after the case, not wanting to be away from Caroline any longer, and Hotch had backed him up, but now, as he silently stripped in the dark at two in the morning, he almost wished that they had stayed the night. He didn't want to disturb his sleeping lover, and he knew from experience she was a light sleeper, but he needed her. So, he carefully slipped under the blankets of their bed, inched closer to her, and took her into his arms. "Shh, Baby, it's just me."

"I know. That's why you don't have two holes in you right now." She answered with a groggy smile as she settled into his embrace. "How was it?"

"I don't want to talk about it. I just want to enjoy the next few hours."

The next morning, Caroline lay in bed and watched the early morning sunshine as it slowly caressed their bed and her lover's face. He looked so peaceful and his arm hadn't let her go the entire night. She had slept deeply for the first time in the week he'd been gone. "Good Morning, Babe." She smiled softly as she watched his eyes flutter open.

"Good Morning, Baby Girl." He gently kissed her lips and held her close, her hand gently caressing his cheek. "How was your week?"

"It was a week like any other except you weren't here."

"Baby,"

"I know." She smiled softly. "And I know what you were talking about before you left. I have been running hot and cold. Seeing my reflection in that wannabe scared me, and I don't scare easily."

"I remember." He kissed her nose as he recalled holding her hand, his belt tied around her leg to attempt to stop the bleeding, and she never did more than the occasional groan at the pain that had to have been intense.

"Last time we were together, it was about proving that I wasn't a weak little girl, that I could take a hit and come back to life. This time, I've been trying to," she paused, "I don't know, but I spent most nights last week in my range proving to myself that I wasn't that guy, that I was a better shot, and in more control. I even impressed myself with my scores."

Derek laughed. "I could have told you that you were a better shot. You are the number five shot in the country, Baby, and that alone should scare me to death, but it doesn't. What scared me was seeing you falling apart and there was nothing I could do to help you or stop it."

"No, there wasn't, and I'll have you know that I'm now the number four shot in the country. My father put in for retirement last week so I get to move up one spot." She laughed. "Trust me, you aren't going to be able to get rid of me that easily this time."

"Baby Girl, I never want to lose you."


	11. Chapter 11

Two months later, Caroline was laughing as she sipped her beer, socializing with Garcia, Prentiss, and J.J. while they watched Morgan dance the night away with some college student in a short skirt. "No, it doesn't bother me because I don't dance. Why should I deprive him of something that brings him so much pleasure just because I have two left feet? Besides, he's in plain sight and keeping his hands to himself." She answered Garcia's question, amazed at how well she was able to get along with Derek's colleagues now that she wasn't a member of the BAU. "Besides, I figure that my time is limited before he realizes that he's in love with you and leaves me."

They all shared a laugh and Penelope turned beet red. "I don't think that's going to happen anytime soon." J.J. jumped in. "You two have been together for over a year. Have you discussed marriage?" The raven-haired woman choked on her beer. "Sorry, I didn't mean to put you on the spot."

"No, that's OK." She said, clearing her throat. "I just am not a fan of that word. I think we're happy the way things are, at least I am. I've seen too many couples who have been together longer than Derek and I suddenly decide to get married and it lasts less than a year. Besides, I'm not exactly the marrying kind. I know that makes me the anti-woman but it's true."

"Why would you not want to claim him as yours?" Garcia asked as she turned her gaze back to the gyrating agent.

"Because I find that putting a ring on someone's finger tends to create feelings of claustrophobia and can cause a person to suddenly bolt in the middle of the night. Why do I need a ring to just continue life the way it is? Though, if you want to ask him to marry you, Penelope, I'm pretty sure he wouldn't say no."

Derek walked over as they were sharing a laugh and grabbed the glass of water from the table behind Caroline, kissing her as he leaned over her. "Hi."

"Hi." She smirked. "You having fun out there making me jealous?"

"You could join me."

"And ruin your groove thang? I don't think so. You go enjoy yourself though."

"That's not going to happen. Sorry, guys, but duty calls." Hotch interrupted. "You might want to join us, Agent James."

J.J. began briefing the team as they walked into the round table room, handing out files, and showing the evidence that the locals had sent over. "And then there's the voicemail." Motioning to Garcia, a young girl's scream followed by a gunshot filled the room, silencing everyone, except Caroline. That was what she was hoping for.

"It's a revolver, large caliber, I'd venture a guess at a forty-five, so we're talking major over-compensation. Play it again and run a filter that adds back in the hertz that the phone company takes out."

"I'll filter out the scream for you as well." Garcia said solemnly, not really wanting to hear that scream again.

"One more time." Caroline closed her eyes again and nodded. "Yeah, it's a forty-five. Could be a Smith and Wesson. I'd have to go back to my lab to be sure, but I can tell you that it's overkill and it's not the most maintained gun in the world. This guy is a real macho man, or at least portrays himself that way."

"It's a start." Hotch looked to Gideon who nodded. "We're wheels up in thirty minutes. You too Caroline."

"I'll grab my gear."

"When we land, Morgan, you, Caroline, and I will go to the scene." Hotch was handing out assignments after they took off. "I want to see if we can find something the locals missed."

"I hate kidnappings." Caroline shook her head as she walked into the master bedroom of the crime scene. "Give me a simple murder any day." There was always fall out from a kidnapping. Seeing the false hope in the family's eyes is was always got to her. She'd seen it families of POWs when she was growing up on the various Marine bases and she never got used to it.

Morgan couldn't say that he disagreed with her. He'd seen too many people torn apart by the terror that kidnappings left behind. "CJ, what's up?" There was a look of confusion on her face as she stared at the patch of bloody carpet and the crime scene photos.

"That window," she gestured to the wall behind them, "the photos say it was closed, but the angle of the shot and the shallow penetration of the low caliber bullet tell me that it was open."

"OK, I see what you're saying." He backed to the window and pretended to aim his gun. "If I'm standing here and shooting you,"

"It's going through my shoulder and into the closet door."

"Exactly, so I would have had to have been using a long range weapon, or else a low charge projectile."

She smiled at him. "You obviously have been taking my class." Nodding, she turned her attention back to the case at hand. "Let's say that you're using a low charge projectile. Why?"

"Maybe I don't want to wake the neighbors when my gun goes off. Or else, I don't want to wake anyone else in the house. Dad wasn't my primary target. I came in to terrorize him, to taunt him that I was going to be taking his daughter. I'm bold, I'm confident."

"Yeah, but then you go and use an un-maintained forty-five to take care of the daughter? It makes no sense, Morgan."

"Unless the forty-five belongs to a second unsub and he's the impulsive one." He placed a hand on her shoulder. "Thanks."

The next night, after they'd captured the unsub, Caroline sat in her hotel room alone, cleaning her gun, when there was a knock on the door. "It's open."

"I noticed. Why did you do that, Caroline?" Reid walked in with a smile.

"Because I have gun oil all over my hands and don't want to deal with opening the door. Don't worry, I can still reach my ankle holster before anyone can cross the distance between the door and the table." And she was expecting Derek to drop by to collect on a rain check he had outstanding, but she wasn't going to tell that to the kid. "What's going on with you, Spence?"

"I'm stuck on how you were able to know what gun the unsub had by the sound."

She smiled and put her Glock back together. "Because each weapon has its own distinct sound. Here," she motioned for his sidearm, "close your eyes and listen." She cocked her weapon, then his, and then reached down and pulled out her ankle revolver. "Could you hear the difference?"

"Between the revolver and the other two, but not the first two."

"There was a subtle difference. It has to do with the amount of metal, the grade of the metal used, and things like that. Don't worry about it, Spence. We all have our talents. It's why we work for the FBI."

"You learned that working for the Marines?"

She laughed. "Spence, I didn't work for the Marines, I am a Marine. There is no such thing as an ex-Marine. Once you are a part of the service, you are always a part of the service. It's a tough thing to explain, but it's like being a cop. Just because you retire doesn't mean that you lose that sense of belonging and can no longer get out of speeding tickets. Am I making any sense?"

"When it comes to the Marine Corp, you never do, so why start now." Derek smiled as he walked into the room.

"It's just because you're jealous that I can do more pushups than you."

"You wish."

"I hear a challenge."

"I, um, I'll see you on the plane, CJ." Reid stood up and made a hasty retreat.

"Since when does Reid call you 'CJ'?" Morgan looked at her with a smirk. "No one else but me is allowed to call you 'CJ'."

"Apparently he didn't get the memo because he started calling me that when you had him profile me." She closed and locked the door.

"You should have stopped him."

"Well, I didn't think it was that big a deal."

"Well, it is."

She took a few deliberate steps towards him. "What are you going to about it?"

Pulling his t-shirt over his head, he closed the distance between them. "I may just have to punish you."

"I've been through boot camp and combat, Supervisory Special Agent Morgan, so bring it on." She stripped down to her bra and watched his smile widen into a lecherous grin.

"You're forgetting I teach hand to hand combat at Quantico."

"I have to tell you, I'm still not that worried."

"You should be." He closed the gap between them and pulled her against him, kissing her hungrily, before scooping her into his arms and carrying her to the bed.

Caroline knew she should push him away, that it wasn't the most professional course of action they could have chosen, but that was part of what excited her. The fact that she had to control herself; her moans, her breathing, her reactions to his touch; gave her a rush that was equal to the rush she got when she was able to drop a subject from three hundred yards.

Derek kissed her sweet red lips, probably more than he would have if they had been home, but she was so vocal during their passion and he knew he had to quiet her. Her lips were going to be swollen, look well kissed, in the morning, but it was the only way to keep them from getting busted that night, and he didn't care. He loved it when her lips looked that way, when they subtly screamed that they'd been close, that he'd been loving up on her, and he kissed her again as he slid into her depths. A stifled moan escaped her throat anyway and he smiled before whispering in her ear. "Shh, Baby Girl, Hotch is right behind this wall."

"You feel so good, Babe."

After their rhythm was established, he had to focus on his own breathing, controlling his own emotions, because she had been right. They fit so well together, felt so good together, that it was so easy to lose himself in their passion, to only focus on their mutual satisfaction, and not worry about his supervisor in the next room.

The climax she experienced threatened both of their jobs, she knew that, and she fought to keep control even as he pushed her over the edge. She pulled him closer, kissing him deeply, as her back arched, pushing her sweat covered body against his, her breath caught in her throat, and she clenched her teeth as she grabbed a hold of the blankets in an effort to stay grounded.

It was too much for him, her beautiful sculpted body pressed against him, his name breathlessly being whispered in his ear as she came down from her peak, and he exploded within her after one last plunge deep into her depths. He buried his face in her neck as he moaned, her hands holding him against her, and he kissed her one last time as they attempted to recover. "We can't do this ever again, CJ." She just smirked at him and he smiled, pulling her against his chest, her head resting on his shoulder. "I can't stay here."

"I know, on both counts, though you started it."

He laughed. "And I finished it, but that was just too wild, Baby. Something could have gone wrong."

"Still could."

"That's why I won't be staying here much longer." He rolled her onto her back and kissed her deeply.

"I love you, Babe." She smiled and kissed him one last time.


	12. Chapter 12

Derek circled the block twice before finally pulling into the driveway of their condo three months later. The man who sat on their front porch had looked familiar, but he wasn't sure it was Caroline's father since he was out of uniform. "Hi Rob. Is Caroline not home?" He extended his hand with as much of a smile as he could muster.

"Either that or she's in her range." The older man suddenly smiled. "Did you have second thoughts about coming home today?"

"I didn't recognize you immediately."

Rob laughed as they walked inside. "I don't even recognize me in civvies half the time."

"Can I get you a beer?" The good lord knew he needed one to deal with Major General Robert Leonard James.

"That would be great, thanks."

"Make yourself comfortable and I'll see if I can find your daughter." Derek headed for the basement door, punching in his security code to disarm the alarm, and then placing his thumb on the lock before he could gain access to the staircase. "Let's see if you can shoot distracted." He grinned and began kissing Caroline's neck.

"I'm used to your distractions, Babe." She turned to face him with a smile. "You're home early."

"Glad I am too because the Major General was sitting on our front porch when I pulled in."

"Daddy's here? Why?"

"I didn't ask, but then again, I don't think he would have answered me if I had."

"He doesn't hate you, you know."

"I'm just not good enough to be with his daughter." Derek pulled away.

"Only because you're not in the military. I think he always saw me as a career Marine like he was and married to one of the Joint Chiefs." She wrapped her arms around his neck. "Besides, I don't care what he thinks. It's my life."

He kissed her. "We better get back upstairs." She always had a way of making him feel at ease and secure in their relationship. It was amazing to him how, with just one kiss, she was able to alleviate all of his fear and doubt, for that moment.

"Ten-Hut!" Rob James commanded when he saw his daughter walk into the living room. "Do you think it's funny leaving a superior officer out on your front porch?" He watched her straighten up and smirked as he walked behind her.

"Sir, no, Major General, Sir. I didn't hear the doorbell since I was down in my range. This Lieutenant Colonel is sorry for the slight she caused the Major General, Sir."

Derek watched with a smile. It was the same routine every time her father showed up. Caroline became a Marine first and his best friend and lover second, but he loved watching her in her element.

"You can repay me by giving me twenty push-ups, Recruit!"

"Sir, yes, Major General, Sir."

"After you give me a hug." He smiled and embraced his daughter as she laughed. "You look good, Boo."

"Thanks, Daddy. So, what brings you to town?"

"Why do you ask? I can't just drop in to say hello to my daughter and her boyfriend?"

Caroline felt Derek tense from her place against him on the couch and lightly placed her hand on his knee. He hated that term, and her father knew he hated that term, since it made them sound like they were back in high school. "You never have before. Is everything alright?"

"I hate retirement, but other than that, everything is fine. I just wanted to see how you were doing, Boo."

The first beer of the evening slid down his throat and Derek longed to go get another one, but refrained. The man sitting on his couch was watching him almost as carefully as he was choosing his words. "I'm sure it's going to take awhile, Rob. You just have to give it time."

"I am bored out of my skull so I came to town to see if I can't go back to being a DI. Maybe work at Quantico."

Caroline choked on her beer. "At Quantico? Daddy, are you sure? It's not quite Marine boot."

"I'm aware of that, Caroline. I'm seventy years old. I can't keep up with the new recruits at boot camp anymore, though I shouldn't have a problem assisting with PT at Quantico."

"Except that the FBI has a maximum entry age of thirty-seven and a mandatory retirement age of sixty." Derek felt the raven-haired beauty in his arms sigh in relief.

"Marines had the same thing." Rob shrugged. "OK, then I guess I'm going to move to Annapolis and help your Uncle Tommy and cousin Sophia run the bed and breakfast."

"I'm sure that Uncle Tommy will welcome the help given his health problems." Caroline smiled.

"I'm sure he will." Rob was silent for a minute as he carefully phrased his next statement. "Boo, there was also something that I wanted to discuss with you in person."

"You have my undivided attention now, Daddy."

"Boo, Honey, I ran into your mother about a month ago."

Derek felt her tense up again and took her hand. While he didn't know exactly what happened with her mother, he knew that she had issues with her and that she hadn't been around when she was growing up. "Do you want me to leave?"

"No, you can stay, Babe, because this conversation isn't going to happen. I don't care what she had to say, if she even asked about me, or what her excuses are because she made her choice. I don't want to hear about it."

Rob smiled. "I knew that was what my girl was going to say and that's exactly what I told her."

"Then why the hell did you bring it up, Daddy?"

"Because I made a promise to her that I would tell you she asked about you."

"Why are you honoring promises to a woman who broke hers? Twenty-three years, Daddy. That's how long it's been since she walked out on us without so much as a Christmas card. Why the hell should I care if she now suddenly gives a crap about how I'm doing?"

"Because I gave her my word that I would tell you she asked about you and a Marine never breaks their word."

"Well, hoo-rah." Caroline spun her finger in the air as she rolled her eyes.

"I suggest you go run off that attitude, Recruit."

"Daddy, I'm thirty-three. That doesn't work anymore."

Rob stood up. "Lieutenant Colonel, I gave you a direct order! Go PT off that disrespectful attitude! Now!"

She stood at attention though she glared at her father. "Sir, yes, Major General, Sir." Giving a mock salute, she stormed back to the bedroom to change into her running clothes.

"CJ,"

"Let her go, Son." Rob caught Derek's arm. "When she gets like this it's best to let her go."

"She needs to deal with this at some point and sending her out for a run doesn't help." He tried to pull away but the older man wouldn't let go. "General, with all due respect, your daughter doesn't need to go for a run; she needs to deal with what happened to her. Caroline is a strong woman, who isn't afraid of much, but she is absolutely terrified of being weak, and she has lousy coping mechanisms when it comes to her emotions because of that. I don't know what happened with your ex-wife, but Caroline still hasn't come to terms with it. She's repressed it to the point that she's afraid that if she feels anything, it will make her appear vulnerable."

"It's not a bad way to be, Derek. This way she's never taken advantage of. Getting to her rank, surviving both Annapolis and boot camp as a woman is quite an accomplishment and if those things happened because she repressed her resentment of my ex-wife, then I'm happy for her. She is the number four shot in the country because she's learned how to control her emotions. Forgive me if I think I know better for my daughter."

There were so many things he wanted to say at that moment, but he refrained, knowing that he would be wasting his breath. "Yes, Sir."


	13. Chapter 13

Caroline ran the two miles to the local high school track and then pushed herself harder than she would have during her normal workout, achieving a three-minute mile. She wanted to focus on something other than the faded memories of her mother that her father had stirred up. The woman was a louse and her father was weak for falling for all of her old tricks. As she ran, the rage turned into determination, and she was able to complete ten miles in a little under a half hour, the feelings of resentment and anger under control.

His cell phone had rung twice in the half-hour Caroline had been gone, but Derek didn't answer it. This took priority. After convincing Rob to go back to his hotel, he sat on their front porch and waited until he watched her running up. "You want to talk about it?" He asked as she stretched and cooled down.

"Talk about what? Do I want to talk about my mother? No. Do I want to talk about how my father is a spineless jellyfish for falling for her every time she shows up? No. So, I guess the answer to that is, please don't ruin the fact that I'm finally in a better mood and he's gone."

His cell rang again. "What?"

"Morgan, Hotch has been trying to get in touch with you for the last half-hour." J.J.'s voice scolded. "We've got a case."

"And I've got a family thing."

"Guess which one takes priority?" She sighed. "I'm sorry, Derek, but Hotch wants everyone in the roundtable room in ten minutes."

"I'll be there in fifteen." He leaned down to kiss her, but she pulled away. "Not my choice, CJ."

"Babe, I'm all sweaty. You can kiss me all you want when you get home." Caroline couldn't help but laugh when he grinned and kissed her anyway. "I'll be here when you get home."

Though, three days later, Caroline wasn't home when Derek walked in the door. Instead, there was a note saying that she'd been called away to a standoff in Idaho and would call him when she got a chance. It was dated the night before, and he smiled to himself as he went through the mail. That was probably why they worked. They both knew, no matter what, their chosen profession was going to come before their personal life. Her philosophy, as she had told him when they had first dated, was if they were meant to have a personal life, it would have been issued with the uniform. That spoke volumes to him, that and her relationship with her father. When her mother had walked out, even if Caroline tried to deny it, it affected her more than she let on or even knew. He shook his head. He didn't want to be a profiler at that moment. He wanted to sleep, and see his girl. At least he had one out of two.

Three days later, Caroline arrived back at Quantico only to be requested by the BAU before she could even drop her gear back at her office. "That ammunition and firearm are very unique." She said as she walked into the roundtable room. "And there's only one place you can find it." She sat down and crossed her legs as she held Hotch's eyes. "Locked away in my basement, I own the patent to that composite." She tossed the file onto the table. "So, I guess it's a good thing that my alibi for the last week is rather solid."

Hotchner's shock quickly faded as he processed the information Caroline had just tossed at him. "Who else as access to that room?"

"Hotch, it's not a room. It's literally my sealed basement. I've soundproofed it and I designed that composite because it's quieter and non-toxic. At least to the environment. I never designed those projectiles to kill. I designed them to puncture paper targets and shatter on the metal wall behind it. And to answer your question, it has an alarm system that is separate from the house alarm and a biometric lock that is programmed to read two fingerprints, mine and Derek's."

"Who else knows about the range and the special equipment?"

"No one." Derek answered as he stood up. "Do not even ask where I've been in the last week, Hotch."

"Trust me, I know where you've been because I've suffered through enough of your coffee." He put his hand on his hip as he thought. "There's no one else who could have had access?"

"Major Gen…"

"Don't, Derek! Daddy wouldn't do this. He's a Marine first and foremost. He doesn't kill for pleasure." Caroline stood up and glared at Derek.

"Think about it, CJ." He shook his head. "Damn, even I missed it until right now. He brought up your mother in front of me. He never discusses family matters in front of me. And, if you remember, he shrugged right after I brought up the maximum age for entry into Quantico. Your father never shrugs. CJ," he placed his hands on her shoulders as he softened his tone, "this is a suicide attempt."

"I'm going to call my Uncle Tommy and you're going to see that he is working at the bed and breakfast in Annapolis. Daddy is not a killer."

Hotch placed his hand over her phone. "We don't have time for that, Caroline, and you know it. Derek, tell us what we're looking for."

Derek faced his colleagues. "Major General Robert James. The man's a damn good shot. Military trained, he's going to be tough to spot, but he'll make a mistake because he wants us to find him. He's despondent about being forced to retire from the only thing he's ever known, the Marine Corp, and being turned down for every other government job he's applied for. Working for his brother must have seemed demeaning because he's used to giving orders, not taking them, and he's not about to admit that he's weak, so he's not going to suicide like a normal person. He's looking to go out suicide by cop."

"How did he gain access to the ammunition?"

"I showed him my range last week. I must have missed when he pocketed it because there is no other way he could have obtained it." Caroline shook her head.

"OK, well, it goes without saying that you and Derek are off this case." Hotch stood up and began packing up. "But if you want to take Reid and go check your inventory, you are more than welcome to call us if it turns out to be a mistake. Otherwise, we'll be in Baltimore."

"That's just it, Hotch. The composite was never designed for long distances. It was designed for target practice only."

"How hard would it have been for him to modify it for long distance?"

"Given his skill," Morgan answered, "it might have only delayed him by a few days."

Hotch reached into the case file and pulled out a picture of the projectile. "Caroline, is this on of your bullets?"

"No, that's a three-oh-eight rifle projectile that appears to be made of the same composition as my ammunition."

"So, he modified it."

"I can't say that for sure until I get my hands on the projectile."

"Caroline," Morgan rolled his eyes and walked away, unwilling to have a fight in front of his coworkers.

"I'll have it sent back." Hotch stepped in. "Now, we have to go. Reid, you go with Caroline and check her range for missing ammunition."

The ride back to their house was silent. Reid didn't know what to say, Morgan was silently stewing behind the wheel, and Caroline was trying to hold on to her denial as she stared out the window in the backseat. The silence continued as she disarmed the basement alarm and placed her finger on the door handle to open it. "There are two full magazines missing, Caroline. How could you not notice this? You notice when I put the gun oil back on the wrong shelf. How can you not notice two magazines gone?" Morgan threw up his hands as he walked away from the locked cabinet.

"Because it's my father, Derek. I still don't think that he took them to do what he is being accused of. He's always calmed himself by taking target practice, like I do, and that's what that ammo is designed for."

Reid stepped in. "Caroline, what would happen if he were to melt those two magazines down and remold them?"

"He wouldn't do that."

"That's not what I'm asking. I'm asking if it could be done."

"I'm guessing it could be done if you had the right tools."

"What sort of tools would be needed?" Morgan lowered his tone as he spoke.

"A bullet mold, a metal file to shape, and something that would be able to heat the substance back to a liquid form. It's not like it can be done on your average kitchen stove."

"How about an industrial gas range?"

"Yeah, that would work, but Daddy didn't do that."

Just then, the phone rang and Morgan heard Hotch's voice telling him that they'd found residue from the composite bullets at Caroline's uncle's place. There was no question the unsub was Major General Robert James. "Except he did. Come on, grab your gear. Hotch seems to think you can find him."

"I can, but I work alone. This is something I have to by myself."

"Caroline, it's too dangerous." Reid spoke. "How do you know that he won't turn the gun on you? Given his behavior, it's possible he could be a family annihilator."

"The kid's right, CJ, neither Hotch, nor I, will let you do this by yourself."

"I know Daddy better than all of you and if he's going to take me down with him, then that's the chance I'm willing to take. I won't have him taking out someone else so he can suicide by cop. Besides, I still don't think he's behind this." She pulled her rifle case onto her shoulder and they drove to the most recent crime scene. "I'll radio you when I pick something up. Other than that, it's radio silence." She packed her hiking pack and pulled it onto her back after pulling her long brown hair on top of her head.

"I still don't like this, CJ. I wish you would take me with you." Morgan put his hand on her shoulder, but she pulled away. "Baby Girl," he whispered, "I'm worried about you. Your head is more focused on proving that your father is innocent than it is on protecting yourself. I don't want to lose you."

"It's the chance I'm willing to take." She dialed Garcia. "Penelope, do you have my signal?"

"Your GPS is coming in loud and clear."

"Thank you." Hanging up, she fastened her handgun holster to her thigh. "I'll check in."

"Every hour or I'm coming after you."

"No, you're going with her." Hotch walked up. "Suit up, Morgan. I'm not letting you go without backup."

"Then you won't get him. Daddy used to teach recruits how to track so he's damn good and two people tracking him will be like a big spotlight and he'll always stay one step ahead. I go by myself or you continue amassing bodies. It has to be me and me alone."

He looked away, knowing she was right, but not liking that fact. "Fine, but I want a report every hour on the hour or I send a chopper looking for you and I will put a spotlight on you."

"Deal." She turned to leave, but Derek caught her arm. "What?"

Touching her cheek, he kissed her deeply, not caring who was around. "Watch your back, CJ."

"Always."

Rob watched the exchange of his daughter and her boyfriend through his scope and smiled softly. She'd found a good man and was safe. It made his decision seem even clearer. It was the only way. He was useless with an unclear purpose. The Marine Corp had pushed him out and taking orders from his brother wasn't what he wanted to spend his remaining years doing. He was trained to do one thing and he did it very well. He needed to show the world that he wasn't too old and he was still the number three shot.

Caroline mentally calculated the trajectory of the bullet and started out in general direction, careful to stay out of the line of fire, and found her father's sniper nest in twenty minutes. It was still warm so he wasn't that far ahead of her and she picked up on his trail relatively easily. He knew she was coming and there were no longer doubts about his guilt. Her father, her hero, had snapped and was proving that he was still just as good as he was when he'd been twenty and in Vietnam. "FBI. Drop the weapon." She aimed her Glock at her father's head two hours later and fought the tears that were just behind her eyes. "I said, drop it, Daddy." He continued to line up the shot on her colleagues. "It's not going to work. I won't let you take them out." She watched his finger closing on the trigger and put a round in his shoulder. "I've located the unsub and I'm going to need a medic. We're clear." She radioed as she pulled the rifle away and quickly treated his wound. "Why Daddy? Just tell me that. Why?"

"You know why, Care Bear, and you could still do what needs to be done. Put a round in my head because you know I won't stop. Even if I go to prison, I won't stop until someone takes me out."

"Shut up, Major General. It's over now. You're under arrest. You have the right to remain silent, which I suggest you take me up on. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford one, one will be provided to you at no cost. Do you understand these rights as I have read them to you?" He didn't answer her. "For Christ sake, Daddy, it doesn't matter anymore. You're going to jail regardless of your answer. Stop being so damn stubborn and make it go a little easier on you."

"Caroline!" Morgan shouted into the wilderness and saw her tending to her father's wound. The shot they'd heard while trying to track her had been hers and he was silently grateful. There had been a fear deep within him twisting him into knots that Rob James had been delusional enough to put a round into his only child.

"He's going to need a hospital, but he'll live to see the inside of a federal prison." She stood up as the paramedics took over, but she noticed her father reach for something under the blanket he was lying on, and she drew her weapon. "Get away!" She screamed at the medics when she saw the hunting knife. The look in her father's eye was one she'd seen in Afghanistan, he wasn't going down without taking someone with him, and she had no choice but to pull the trigger, her round going right where she'd aimed, into his head, and it was over.

Caroline never lowered her weapon after firing twice, saving the lives of the two paramedics, and Morgan slowly walked up to her. "CJ, I need you to lower your gun. It's done. You did what had to be done." He pulled her weapon from her hands, but she was still catatonic.

"I killed my father."

"No, Agent James, you killed an unsub who was about to take out a member of the team." She finally looked at him.

"I'm sorry. I didn't clear the scene. I never saw the knife before he pulled it out."

"I know you didn't, CJ. He was lying on it."

"I should have cleared the scene. This never would have happened if I had just followed protocol."

Hotch motioned for him to take her back down the mountain and Derek wrapped his arms around her shoulders. "Let's go home, Baby. It's over for today." At the bottom, he handed her to the paramedics who told him what he already knew, she was in shock, and they would be taking her to the hospital to be checked out. He told her he'd meet her there and whispered he loved her in her ear before closing the door and watching the ambulance pull away.


	14. Chapter 14

"From the halls of Montezuma, to the shores of Tripoli," Caroline quietly recited the Marine Hymn as she sat in the emergency room. It helped her focus, it always had, even in the darkest days in Afghanistan, but it wasn't at that moment. Her leg was paining her, her head felt detached from her body, and her ears kept hearing the shot ringing out that killed her father. "We fight our country's battles, in the air, on land, and sea." She pulled her knees up and laid her head against them, trying to take herself to a place that wasn't the same ER where she was taken when she'd been shot. "First to fight for right and freedom, and to keep our honor clean, we are proud to claim the title of United States Marine."

"Hey Beautiful." Derek tried to smile when he stuck his head around the ER curtain, but he'd heard her softly reciting the same thing she'd recited the night she'd been shot. "Hey, Marine, talk to me." She still didn't look at him and he placed his hand on her shoulder. "Where are you?" There was still no response. "Our flag's unfurled to every breeze," he recited with her, hoping it would bring her back to him, "from dawn to setting sun."

"We have fought in every clime and place," she continued, oblivious to who was reciting with her, "where we could take a gun. In the snow of northern far-off lands and in the sunny tropic scenes, you will always find us on the job, The United States Marines."

"Lieutenant Colonel, how about giving me your statement?"

"Here's health to you and to our Corps," she paid him no mind, finally able to focus enough to block out the world around her, "which we are proud to serve; In many a strive we fought for life, and never lost our nerve."

"Baby Girl, I'm here for you. You'll get through this." Morgan gave up and just began massaging her neck. There was going to be no talking to her when she was in her Marine zone. She was focused on blocking out everything, on not feeling the pain, not feeling the emotions, and there was nothing he could do to pull her back.

"If the Army and the Navy," she continued, "Ever look on Heaven's scenes, they will find the streets are guarded, by United States Marines." She finished, falling silent for a few seconds, able to finally be in control of her emotions.

"How is she?" Hotch asked as Morgan walked into the waiting room.

"She's withdrawn and in shock. We're not getting anything out of her tonight."

"That wasn't why I was asking, Derek."

He sighed. "She's reciting the Marine Hymn repeatedly and I can't get her to stop. The doctors are saying that it may take awhile for her to snap out of it given the extreme psychological trauma she's suffered, and I'm terrified that she's not going to snap out of it this time."

"She's strong. She'll get through this."

"I hope so."

The next morning, Caroline began pulling off all of the monitors and the IV lines as she dressed in her street clothes. She hated hospitals and she wasn't sick so she was leaving. "I'm fine. Just bring me the papers and I'll sign out AMA." She barked at the nurse. "I'm going home."

"Ms. James, please, the doctor will be here in an hour and then you will most likely be discharged. You suffered a major psychological trauma. You need to speak with the doctor."

"Psychological trauma? Honey, I shot my father before he could slice the throat of a paramedic." The nurse was silent. "Yeah, I don't think a doctor will be able to help me either. I'm one whacked out lunatic. Good thing I work for the good guys." She smiled sarcastically as she buttoned her blouse. "Now, I'm leaving with or without signing out."

"CJ," Morgan walked into the room and nodded at the nurse, "I think you need to stay and get checked out by the doctor. At least talk over what happened with someone."

"No, now where's my gun? You call that young chick in here and ask what the hell happened to my forty-five."

"I took it home last night along with your badge. We didn't want it falling into the wrong hands given that you weren't exactly aware of the world around you."

"I was aware, Derek, I just didn't want to deal with all the pity and concern. I had a momentary loss of control and focus. It won't happen again. Now, can we go home?"

"No, you're staying and talking with the doctor."

"Then I'll call a cab."

"You'll do nothing of the sort, Baby Girl. I've been sent to make sure that you know you can either talk to the doc here or you can go talk to Hotch for an evaluation. It's your choice, but OPR is going to be looking for you to undergo some form of treatment before they will allow you to resume your duties."

She sighed and shook her head. "Damn rat squad." Sitting back on the bed, she took a deep breath. "OK, so I guess I'm here for another few hours."

"Smart move." He sat down next to her and took her into his arms. "You'll get through this, CJ."

Two hours later, Caroline told the shrink what he wanted to hear, shed a few tears, and signed the discharge papers. She was sure that the doc hadn't bought what she was selling, but he agreed to discharge her and allowed her to get back to work after she promised to come in for three more sessions. She would have agreed to desk duty if it had gotten her out of the hospital.

In a predictable fashion, Derek watched Caroline descend to her range when she arrived home. Waiting an hour, he went down and watched her destroy three paper targets. "How did it go with the shrink?"

"I'm screwed up, I need several more sessions in order to be considered normal, and I shouldn't be so nonchalant about having pulled the trigger on so many bad people." She fired a few more rounds into the target's head. "It's the same tune I hear every time I'm up for my psych evaluation. I don't do what a typical woman should do so I get put under a tighter microscope." Three more shots went into the target's abdomen. "I really wish they would just let me do what I do and leave me alone." She reloaded her clip. "Tomorrow I have to go talk with Hotch before I can be cleared to go back to work." She shook her head and proceeded to empty her clip again.

He took the weapon from her, reloaded, changed the target, and fired. "Does this really help you feel better?"

"It helps me focus." She took her weapon back. "It's what I do, Derek. It's what I've always done."

"How about dealing with what is going on in your head instead of blocking it out?"

"Don't make me shoot you."

He placed his hands on her shoulders and kissed the top of her head. "Talk it out, CJ. Especially this time."

She squeezed off the remaining rounds. "Because I put a round into the head of my father? He wasn't exactly my father at that time, Derek."

"I'm glad you are able to admit that now."

"See, letting me handle things in my own way is probably better than attempting to profile me. I'm not going to go out shooting people and I'm still going to be able to do my job. I wish people would stop trying to make me behave like a typical weak female."

"Baby, we aren't trying to make you act like a weak female, but under the circumstances, no one would fault you if you shed a few tears for the loss."

"What loss?" She spun around as she raised her voice. "I shot my father! I know that I shot my father! Talking endlessly about it is not going to change the fact that there is a forty-five caliber hole in the forehead of a great Marine Major General. He went crazy and there was no other choice. You want me to be upset? I'm upset, but I did what had to be done. It doesn't mean that I'm happy about it and it certainly doesn't mean that I'm going to suddenly get weak."

"CJ," he sighed and shook his head, "it's not about being weak. It's about dealing with the natural human emotions that you are feeling."

"I am dealing with them." She threw up her hands. "I'm going for a run."

Catching her arm, he stopped her. "No, I have a better idea." He led her up to their attic where he'd setup his home gym. "You're going to go a few rounds with me."

"Sweetheart, I don't want to hurt you. I'm not in the mood to play nice."

"Then don't play nice." He tapped the side of her head, causing her to knock him onto the mat. "Glad that you're warmed up." He stood up and they began to spar.

An hour and a half later, her energy spent, her body hurting in places she didn't know she had muscles, she collapsed, winded, to the mat. "What did that prove, Babe? That I can still kick your ass?"

"Tell me what you're feeling besides tired."

She stood up and resumed her fighting stance. "Let's go."

"No, you're done."

"No, I'm not, because I'm still not going to talk about this."

"Humor me."

"Isn't that what I've been doing for the last hour?"

"Caroline," he shook his head and attempted to keep his temper in check, "you're father is gone. He's dead and you haven't even so much as called a funeral home. It's not about being weak. It's about being human."

The hot tears in her eyes began falling down her cheeks before she could stop them and she ran at him, her fists pounding against his muscular chest. "How dare you! You don't have any idea how much that man meant to me. He was the greatest man I had ever known until I met you and I'm the one who killed him. I screwed up and I gave Daddy what he wanted. If I had just cleared the scene properly, he would be sitting in a prison cell right now instead of being fitted for a casket. Don't you think that I feel that loss? It was just he and I from the time I was ten until I went off to Annapolis at eighteen. So, yes, I am human, Derek! I just prefer not to be constantly reminded of the fact that I put a forty-five caliber round into his skull!"

"OK, Baby Girl." He held her as she collapsed, finally grieving the way she needed to in order to move forward. There was so much pain and guilt inside of her that she had bottled up that she need to let out. "Let it out."

"I hate you right now." She said softly as she pulled away.

"I know." He kissed her. "I'm going to take a shower. You are welcome to continue to hate me as you join me."

She didn't want to, she wanted to stay angry, to remain focused, but she was too tired, too spent, and she actually wanted to be with him. "I'll think about it."

A smile curved his lips as he headed for the bathroom. She would be in once he started the water, and she was, wrapping her arms around his waist as they stood under the streaming showerhead, the warm water cleansing more than their bodies. "Do you still hate me?"

"Yes, I still hate you for doing what you did."

He kissed the top of her head before gently guiding the water over her long brown hair, caressing her neck as he did. "You won't in a minute."

She knew he was right and wrapped her arms around him, her hands holding him closer as he laid tender kisses along her slick skin. His touch always seemed to calm her, make her feel loved and wanted, and, when he caressed her like a lover, the rest of the world slipped away. Her mind knew that he had done the right thing, though she hated crying. It was a sign of weakness and she never wanted to be weak. Being weak was too stereotypical and she had worked too hard to break those stereotypes. She was at the top of her field, something few women had done, and she certainly hadn't gotten there by being overly emotional. "Mmm, Derek, you feel so good." She called out for him as he moved down her body.

Her knees were buckling, her hands attempting to brace her feminine form, and he knew it was time. So, he lifted her, her long beautiful legs wrapping around his waist as he pinned her against the wall, sliding his erect member deep within her depths. She called out for him again, kissing him hungrily as they established their rhythm. The water from the shower cascading over their naked bodies, making them slide easily together, cooling them as their peaks generated steam from their skin. "Baby Girl," he said with a whisper as he caught his breath, "I love you."

"I love you, Babe." She kissed him deeply again. "I don't think I could ever hate you for that long, but don't push it." He just grinned and kissed her again.

The next afternoon, Morgan watched Caroline go into Hotch's office and close the door. Hotch had the blinds closed so he couldn't see what was going on, but he worried just the same. She wasn't ready to return to work. The previous night she'd had wicked nightmares that had her tossing and turning in her sleep, calling out for him, and she wouldn't wake up until he shook her. It was the same reaction she'd had after she'd been shot and he didn't want her spiraling into a depression again. He didn't want to lose her again. "What?"

Reid broke Morgan's line of sight. "You do realize that it hasn't been proven that staring at an object will make it burst into flames, right?"

"What are you talking about, Kid?"

"I'm talking about you focusing on Hotch's office door for the last twenty minutes."

"Leave it alone, Reid."

"I'm just saying."

"And I'm just saying to leave it alone, Kid."

Morgan rarely snapped at him like that. There had to be something major happening and when he saw Caroline emerge from Hotch's office a half-hour later, he knew what was going on. "Hi CJ."

"Hey Spence." Caroline spoke ruefully as she walked down the aisle, motioning for Morgan to join her outside of prying ears. "I'm guessing you were staring like that the entire time I was in there?" He didn't answer her as they stepped into an empty conference room. "Real smooth, Morgan. How many times do we have to be told to tone down our relationship stuff at the office?"

"Enough. What happened with Hotch, CJ?"

"I'm being placed on modified duty for two weeks so I can undergo psychological testing. Apparently, I didn't shed the required number of tears with the shrink."

"Maybe it's because you are having nightmares and have barely grieved for the loss of your father."

"Don't profile me, Morgan. I just sat through close to an hour of being profiled by your boss." She turned her back. "And, for your information, I have grieved, you saw it. I don't lie around crying for weeks on end. It's not my way. Hell, I didn't even cry when I was shot, if you'll remember."

"No, you didn't cry, but you cried after that wannabe Marine took JJ hostage, and you confessed to me that you contemplated suicide. CJ, Baby Girl, you're coming apart. Maybe it is time that you take some time off and relax."

"And you went running to Hotch to tell him all of that, didn't you?" She suddenly shot around and glared at him. Her words hissing through clenched teeth. "I told you that in confidence."

"I told Hotch nothing, CJ. Hotch is the leader of the BAU. If I can spot you spiraling, you better believe that he noticed it before I did. You're paranoia is a sure sign that he made the right call." He sighed. "Look, Baby Girl, why don't we make the most of this. We'll both take some vacation time and we'll go somewhere for two weeks, just you and me. You are always saying that you want to go back to Key West, sit by the water, and soak up the sun. Why don't we do that now?"

She sighed. She hadn't meant to snap at him, and had been snapping at everyone since her release from the hospital. Maybe he was right. Maybe she was falling apart. All she knew was that she was going through the same self-doubt she thought she beat back when she joined The Bureau. "Yeah, that might work."

He took her into his arms and kissed the top of her head. "Let me go talk to Hotch and then we'll leave." It had almost been too easy to convince her. At least she was able to recognize that she needed a break, and Hotch agreed, allowing him to take two weeks of emergency leave. They were on their way to Miami International by dinner.


	15. Chapter 15

Caroline awoke with a smile on her face still tangled in soft cotton sheets and Derek's arms. They'd been in Key West for a full week and the nightmares had finally stopped. She was relaxed, Derek had seen to that. He was spoiling her with his pampering and she was coming to the realization that she had taken him for granted for almost two years. She had been coming apart, losing her grip on reality, and she was becoming a person she couldn't even stand until Derek, her lover and her best friend, had stepped in and held a mirror up to her. He had never been afraid to stand up to her, to give back all the crap that she wasn't afraid to dish out, and to think, she laughed to herself, he wasn't a Marine. "Good Morning, Babe."

"Good Morning, Baby Girl." He stretched with a smile. "What are you laughing about so early in the morning?"

"Babe, it's almost nine. It's not early."

"You still didn't answer my question."

"I was laughing about the fact that you aren't a Marine and yet you aren't afraid to act like a DI."

"I did go through Quantico." He grinned before kissing her.

"Not the same thing, Handsome, but that was a nice try." She laughed as he rolled on top of her, pinning her to the bed. "I thought we were going to the beach today?"

"The beach will still be there in a few hours." Derek's smile widened as she laughed again. She had needed the break their impromptu vacation had allowed. She was back to being the fun-loving woman he'd fallen in love with instead of the angry and volatile warrior she was becoming. She'd seen more atrocities than any human should and she'd been charged with playing God over others lives, able to take out a person from hundreds of yards away. The entire breadth of the killing, the death, she had caused, had caught up with her after the death of her father. She was questioning who she was, he had seen that, and so had Hotch. It had caused her to become even angrier, sink further into the sea of self-doubt, and it had worried him just how quickly her downward spiral had been progressing. Escaping to Key West, just the two of them, had helped her. There had been more than a few nights where she had opened up to him, told him her deepest fears, and he had taken them from her, soothed her, and she was coming back to life.

The touch of his skin against hers, the feel of his tender caresses against her neck, she couldn't resist him, but, then, she never had been able to resist him. All it took was a wink or a smile and she was putty in his hands. When he placed delicate kisses down her skin, she melted, especially in the past week. He'd brought her back from the brink, from a dark place where her own thoughts scared her, and all by loving her.

His hands were strong yet tender as they gripped hers, his ears listening to her breath coming quicker as he placed a line of kisses down her abdomen, stopping just above her belly button, and she arched her back, bringing her body closer to him. Returning to her sweet red lips, he kissed her again as she pressed her warm perfect body against his, silently asking him to take her. She'd been so open with him, almost delicate, over the past week, and he was happy to oblige. She was so passionate yet sensitive, so hungry yet subdued, and as he caressed her entire body with both his hands and his mouth, allowing her to fill all of his senses, she breathily moaned her approval and her want. He couldn't deny her any longer and slowly, deliberately, slid inside her, his name escaping from her lips as her body pressed against his again. They moved in a perfect rhythm as though they were composing a beautiful symphony, each knowing what the other required without speaking a single word. With his head buried against her neck, her arms around him, gripping his shoulders as they moved, the only words he could manage were words of love, and even that became difficult as he neared his peak. He felt her breath stop momentarily as her body shuttered, her climax catapulting her into the throws of passion, and he couldn't contain his any longer. Her name came out as a moan as he felt himself explode within her, the world beyond their bed ceasing to exist for a moment, and he kissed her deeply as they collapsed together, their love taking all the energy they had in them.

_ZZZZZZZZZZZZ Criminal Minds Criminal Minds Criminal Minds ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ_

_Dear Readers:_

_Judging from all the hits and reviews I've gotten, Derek and Caroline have become just as intriguing to you as they have been to me. I know that their story is not finished and it is not fair to you, the reader, to turn this story into a soap opera. So, based on the reviews that I have received, I have decided to end this chapter of their story here and continue Derek and Caroline's search for a happy ending in another edition._

_Don't worry, it won't be long before they start screaming to be heard again. Caroline is a formidable opponent and very good at being stealth. So, stay tuned and I am so happy you have all enjoyed Derek and Caroline as much as I have._

_All the best,_

_Cat_


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